Dancing Away With My Heart
by EdwardsButterflygrl
Summary: Jaded, cynical Edward is reunited with childhood friend Bella at his sisters wedding. Can he let go of his hurt and let her in again? AH
1. Chapter 1

Ch. 1

Edward's POV

Stereotypical. That's the word I'd use to describe the whole damn affair. Though I'd be a dead man if my sister Rosalie, or my new brother-in-law, Emmett, knew I used that word to describe their big day. So, here I am, in a monkey suit, at the open bar (Emmett's idea) for my sister's wedding reception. Most of the guests and the wedding party were out on the dance floor dancing to every popular, over played songs that are played at every single wedding reception in America.

I downed my glass of scotch and scanned all the faces in the room. Some were familiar, some strangers. I was on my way back to the "head" table, when a brunette wearing one of the blood red bridesmaids dresses caught my eye. It was Rosalie's maid of honor, Isabella something. I'll admit, she bore a striking resemblance to our childhood friend Bella Swan, but there was no way Isabella whatever her last name is, and Bella were one in the same. The idea was absolutely ludicrous. I studied this Isabella character, and there is no denying how attractive she is. As she dances with the flower girl, an infant in a white dress with a red bow, I studied the curves on Isabella. Legs, long, slender, and very defined, leading to what I can only assume to be well rounded hips and plump ass at the base of a slender waist and torso. The neckline of the dress hinted at nicely rounded breasts. Her shoulders were broader than most women, but did not take away from her beauty, and her neck, long and slender like the rest of face was lit up with a big smile, framed by a few chocolate brown curls about the same color as her eyes. Rosalie demanded that all her bridesmaids hair had to be in an up-do so she was the only one with her hair down, so I couldn''t judge accurately the length of this girls hair, but it looked so soft, my fingers are literally aching to feel those curls.

"A penny for your thoughts?" I was startled out of my musings by my cousin, Jasper.

"Nah, you don't want to know." I replied.

"Scoping out your next one night stand?" He asked.

"How'd you guess?" I asked sarcastically.

"I think I should know you by now." He replied. "Rosalie and Emmett plan a good party."

"Yeah, it's nice." I replied swallowing hard. I hoped he didn't hear the strain in my voice because he'd know I was lying and promptly tell Rosalie, who'd send Emmett after my ass.

"Uh huh. So who is the 'lucky' lady you've set your sights on this time?" Asked Jasper curiously.

"The maid of honor who's dancing with the flower girl." I replied nodding in the direction of the brunette on the dance floor.

"Ah, Isabella Biers and her daughter Riley."Jasper replied smiling. "Good luck."

"Why? You don't think I can get the girl to sleep with me?" I asked smirking at him.

"Let's just say, I think she's looking for more than a one night stand seeing as she has a baby daughter." Jasper said knowingly.

"Uh huh, we'll see about that." I said standing up. I buttoned the buttons of my tux coat and made my way towards the beautiful brunette who'd captured my attention.

She was no longer dancing, but talking and laughing with Rosalie and Jasper's wife, Alice, another one of Rosalie's bridesmaids. As I neared the group of girls, I caught the sound of her laughter, and a sense of familiarity came over me. It seemed like I'd heard that laugh before, but for the life of me, I couldn't place it. I just shook off the feelings coursing through me and inserted myself into their conversation.

"I agree, this is the best wedding I've been to Rosie, and that includes my own." Alice said.

"Bragging again Rose?" I asked lightly.

"No, never dear brother." She replied giving me her infamous innocent face. The same face she used to get things from mom and dad growing up.

"Uh huh." I replied rolling my eyes at her.

"You remember Isabella, right?" Asked Alice.

"Yes, the maid of honor. Are you enjoying this extravagant party?" I asked her ignoring Rosalie's glare.

"Yes I am. It's the most fun I've had since my husband died, and Riley was born." Isabella replied, a haunted look shadowing her beautiful brown eyes.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you." I said. Not that I really gave a shit. I just wanted to sleep with her. I can't even explain what it is about her that makes me lust over her, big time.

"Hey, down't worry about it. Ryan passed when I was five months pregnant. Killed over in Afghanistan." She replied.

_So, she's a milf and a widow? Could be interesting_ I thought.

"What do you do?" I asked out loud.

"Well, before I got pregnant, I was a ballet instructor for Julliard in New York City, and was an active dancer with the ABT. She replied straightening her spine. "Now that I've moved back here, I work with the Infinity group and am an instructor for the Chautauqua Regional Youth Ballet, as well as the Jamestown Skating Club."

"Holy wow." I replied. nThe girl has actually rendered me speechless. She was apparently very prominent in the arts. "I take it you enjoy the arts?"

"Oh yes, very much. It's a rewarding and fairly lucrative career." She replied, straightening her back and raising her chin a little. She was definitely proud of what she did, and all she'd accomplished.

"Let's not re-hash that." Rosalie interjected.

Something in the atmosphere had changed at her reply, but I wasn't sure exactly what, though a nagging feeling lingered that I should know why.

"Rosalie, if you want to get out of here on time for your flight, we need to do that bouquet and garter toss." Isabella sadi suddenly after glancing at her watch.

"Oh goodness, where's Emmett?" Rosalie asked looking around frantically.

"He's standing by the open bar nursing a beer, talking to dad." I said.

"Thanks Edward. You've just volunteered yourself to go tell him to meet me at the DJ." Rosalie replied walzing off withIsabella and Alice in tow.

Cursing under my breath, I worked my way through the crowd towards Emmett. Why my sister volunteered me to do everything was beyond me. Just because I was the older of the two of us, did not mean I should be her slave. My inner rant came to an end when I finally got to where Emmett and my dad, Carlisle, were having what seemed to be a serious conversation.

"Haven't you done all your threatening before now?" I asked dad.

"Never Edward. Eventually you'll learn that for yourself. If you ever settle down that is." My dad replied winking at me.

"Never going to happen pops. Emmett, your wife requests your presence at the DJ set up. Something about throwing some flowers and a piece of lingerie." I replied.

"Okay, thanks bro. By the way, superbowl, my house, you, Jasper, me, and lots of alcohol." Emmett said.

"Sweet. Count me in." I replied giing him a high five.

"Now gentelmen, gotta go find Rose before she gets mad at me." Emmett said with a quick wave good bye.

I was about to walk away when my dad caught me by the shoulder.

"Edward." Dad said stopping my escape to the bar.

"Yes dad?" I asked.

"I understand why you'd be hesitant to settle down with someone, but I saw you talking to Isabella. Don't you dare try dragging her down with you." He said sternly.

"Oh-kay, why are you telling me this? Shouldn't her father be doing that?" I asked.

"He would if he were able to make it to the wedding." Dad replied.

"Oh? And how would you know that?" I shot back.

"You don't remember her do you?" He asked. I shook my head indicating I didn't and waited for an explanation. "Isabella Biers is Bella Swan. She prefers Isabella now because of her prestigious career." He said.

My heart had to have stopped beating. The last time Bella and I talked, we had a nasty argument about her going to school for ballet. I turned around just in time to see Bella catch Rosalie's flowers. Suddenly, I could see the old Bella in the woman smiling with her daughter in her arms. The DJ announcing the garter toss broke me from the mini trance I'd been in. Dad pushed me forward to join the group of single men gathered on the dance floor. I made sure to stand near the back so I didn't have to catch it, but Emmett being the athlete he is, tossed the silk-covered elastic right to me.

I snatched it out of the air and groaned when everyone clapped. I shook Emmett's hand and then hugged my sister while the rest of the guests filed outside to wave the newlyweds goodbye. Mom and dad also said their goodbyes, along with Jasper, Alice, and Bella.

Once the goodbyes were said we watched them run to their limo in a shower of birdseed and waved when the limo left.

After that, guests filtered out rather quickly after complimenting my parents. Bella held the now sleeping flower girl while she talked animatedly to Alice. The conversation lasted until all the guests were gone, save for mo, dad, me, Jasper, Alice, and Bella with her daughter. I breathed a sigh of relief in the silence, and of course in Alice fashion, she didn't let it last long.

"Okay, the Cullen-McCarty wedding waas a great success. Now it's time to do what needs to be done so we can all go to the hotel. Presents need to be loaded into Emmetts Hummer and driven to their house. Whoever does that will need someone to follow so they have a ride back here. Disposable cameras need to be markked with the table number and put into this gift bag." She said holding up a gift bag with a picture ofa bride and groom in black and white. "Also, any remaining party favors, put into a box and pack them in mama Esme's Equinox. Mama Esme, Papa Carlisle, you are not to do anything. Just have a drink at the bar, relax, and let us handle this. Let's get to doing."

"Alice, I'll take the gifts and Emmett's Hummer to his house." I called over to Alice.

"Okay Edward. Isabella? Would you be willing to follow Edward and bring him back here?" Alice yelled over to Bella.

"Yeah, no problem." Isabella called back while fastening the baby in her car seat. I turned around and helped Jasper with loading up the Hummer.

"So, how long have you known Isabella is Bella?" I asked Jasper once we got outside.

"Since she moved back to Jamestown from New York City about a month ago." Jasper replied.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked.

"Honestly none of us wanted to tell you with what happened when you two stopped speaking, and because you're too much of a playboy." He said matter-of-factly.

"So let me get this straight, because of an argument that happened almost 10 years ago, and the fact that I refuse to be in a relationship but choose to enjoy a woman inimately, you kept Bella moving back a secret?" I asked incredulously.

"Yeah, she doesn't need to be messed around with by your, or at least that's what Charlie, and uncle Carlisle decided." Jasper answered shrugging.

"Ugh. So it's dad and Charlie who came up with this?" I asked.

"Yep." Jasper replied.

"Nice to know how non-trustworthy I am." I spouted, pissed off at how my own dad made it clear he didn't trust me behind my back. Charlie I wasn't surprised about, nor could I really blame the guy. I'm a fathers worst nightmare when it comest to his daughter. My issue was with Carlisle.

I tried shaking the overwhelming anger towards my father while Jasper and I loaded the Hummer up with the hundreds of gifts they'd gotten. By the time we were done, I was exhausted, but calm. Inside, everyone was in a flurry of activity, trying to get things done. I approached Bella and tapped her on the shoulder.

"Hey, I'm ready to head for Rosalie and Emmett's." I said holding up the spare keys for the Hummer.

"Let me grab Riley'scar seat." She replied.

I gave Jasper and Alice a quick wave and floowed Isabella out the door.

"So which car is yours?" I asked. I figured she drove a pretty nice car with her career.

It's the black Audi A6." She replied gesturing towards it with her hand.

"Nice car. Bet it has awesome power to it." I commented walking along side of Bella.

"With the turbo this car has, it definitely has power." She said lightly.

I watched, impressed as she opened the back door to the car, swing the car seat into the back, and clicked it into place.

"Okay Edward, we're ready to follow." Bella said once she shut the back door.

"Okay, let's do this." I replied smiling.

As I walked over to the Hummer, oddly enough, I started to feel a little bit like the old Edward again. The one Bella knew, not the Edward that was broken. I climbed into the Hummer and started the engine with a quick turn of my wrist. I smiled at the sound because I really wanted a Hummer, always have. If only I had the money. Unfortunately student loans for med school took precedence over buying an expensive as shit car.

Giving Bella a thumbs up, I put the car in reverse, and backed it out of it's parking sppot. I pulled it forward a bit so Bella could do the same. Once she was behind me, I led her to Rosalie and Emmett's. The drive was quiet, and quite uneventful. Every so often I'd check the rear-view mirror to make sure she was still behind me, especially on was, every time I looked, and before I knew it, I was pulling into the driveway of a small white, 2 story house that was owned by the McCarty newlyweds.

I shut off the engine and pocketed the keys beefore getting out. I crossed in front of the Audi, and dropped into the passengers seat. She shocked me with the music playing through the speakers.

"I thought you'd still be listening to country music Bella." I commented.

Apparently that was not the thing to say because in the second that I finished my observation, I was bracing myself against the dashboard when she suddenly slammed on her breaks.

"Let me just be clear on this; I'm not 'Bella' anymore, it's Isabella, and like my preference in name, a lot about me has changed Edward." She said looking me dead in the eye.

"I'm sorry Isabella. I didn't mean to offend you. I understand being a different person than the one you were before. I sure as hell am not." I replied before I could stop myself.

"I know Edward, I've heard. Let's start over as the new us." Bella replied smiling.

"Okay, I'd like that." I told her. Amazingly that wasn't just a line I was using to get her to sleep with me. I actually meant it. Then again, Bella wasn't just some girl, she was my childhood friend, and the only person I've been truly in love with. "So, when did you start listening to Disturbed?" I asked curiously.

"My room mate in college, Jane listened to them, and I liked the band after a while." She said smiling. "How'd you know the band name?"

"Down With the Sickness came up on my Pandora station one day, and like you, I listened and liked the song. I now have their entire discography on my Ipod." I replied.

"Ironically, so do I." Bella responded with a touch of excitement in her voice.

"NIce." I replied with a laugh. "Are you staying at the Sheridan in Erie with the rest of the wedding party?"

"No, I'm actually taking Riley to see my mom and Phil." Bella said sadly.

"Oh ok, I was going to go so we could catch up." I told her honestly.

"Catching up would be great. We should do lunch sometime." She said brightening up.

"Definitely." I replied happier than I'd been in a long time.

We rode the rest of the way back in silence. When she pulled in, she pulled up to the door and stopped. We exchanged phone numbers and promised to set up a lunch for catching up.

"Edward?" She said as I was opening the passenger door.

"Yeah?" I asked back.

"I just want to say, I think the old you is still in there no matter what Carlisle and my dad says. I believe in you." She told me.

Her words stunned me. Apparently had more faith in me than my own father.

"How can you say that Isabella? It's been nearly 10 years." I replied.

"In the short drive back, I saw a lot of your old personality come through what my dad had told me about you now." She said shrugging.

"I hope one day I can tell you why I am who I am today." I told her. I didn't want to risk her not wanting to be friends with me again.

"I hope so too because I want to be friends again." She replied.

Just like that I fell for her all over again. We said goodbye, and she drove away. I stood in front of the doors to where my sister's wedding reception had been held in a complete daze.

Isabella was on her way to Rochester, but her words were on repeat in my head. She believed in me, she believes in me. She wants to at least be friends. She's not writing me off as just a playboy.

I pulled together the front I put on for my family and entered the building.

"Ah, I see you made it back." Jasper said.

"Oh yeah, Isabella drives just fine." I replied suggestively.

"Please tell me you didn't." Jasper said with a groan.

"Maybe, maybe not." I replied shrugging. I was annoyed. Of course they all assumed the worst of me. I frowned and walked over to Alice to give her Emmett's car keys.

"here Pixie." I said shortly, holding out the car keys.

"Thanks Edward." She responded cheerfully. "By the way, you can't fool me."

"No idea what you're talking about." I told her, winking.

"How was the ride back?" She asked quietly.

"It was great Ali. She's so cool. She said she believes in me, and she wants to be friends again." I said.

"That's great! I'm so happy for you. You need someone else besides me to have faith that you're more that meets the eye." She replied.

Alice was my first friend in Med school, and now I remembered why she was still my best friend, and it wasn't just because she married my cousin.

"Thanks Ali. That means a lot." I said giving her a one armed hug.

"Not a problem. Maybe we should set up a time to meet?" She asked.

Alice is a Psychiatrist, and I do go to her for counseling. It's the largest secret I've kept from my family. Absolutely no one but me and Alice knows about my therapy.

"Yeah, I think I need to meet." I whispered.

"Okay, call me tomorrow around 3, I'll be in the office for a bit, and I'll get you scheduled." She replied with a soft smile.

"Thanks Ali." I replied

Bella had changed something in me with just one small sentence. The moment was broken by my phone alerting me to a new text. I dug the phone from my tux while Alice snorted, shaking her head.

"Listen shorty, I'm still bigger than you." I playgully threatened.

"Bring it!" She challenged back before sticking her tongue out at me.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/n: Hello readers! I'm absolutely thrilled with the response this new story is getting! Thank you, I'm entirely flattered considering this is only fanfic # 2 for me. I'm going to try for an update every other week that way I don't neglect my other fanfic which is still in progress. I hope you all enjoy this second chapter of Dancing Away With My Heart!**

**Oh, and before I forget, I don't own Twilight or any of the characters but I do own the books!**

Chapter 2

Bella's POV

The drive to Rochester was very uneventful. Ten minutes outside the town of Arcade, I received a text from Edward asking me to let him know I got there safe. For some reason that made me smile. He seemed to care about mine and Riley's safety despite the fact I'd driven this route hundreds of times. At the next red light I sent him a response. I made it to Arcade in about 7 minutes instead of 10, so I stopped at the McDonalds there and got a caramel hot chocolate before continuing on my way.

The rest of my trip was spent thinking about Edward. I remembered when I first saw him again after so many years. It was at the rehearsal. I was running late because as I was getting ready to leave the house, Riley exploded her diaper, forcing me to have to give her a quick bath and change of clothes. When I finally got to the church though, Rose and Alice were arguing about the processional, and Edward was leaning against a wall on the opposite end of the sanctuary. He was staring off into space, no smile, and his eyes-whoever saidthat the eyes are a window to the soul was dead on. Edward's eyes showed a brokenness, a distant coldness due to that brokenness. Throughout the rehearsal he was stand-offish, and would give me blank looks, as though he had no idea who I was.

Today, he was acting as though he was simply humoring everyone by being in the wedding. I hated that he'd look detached in Rose and Emmetts wedding photos. I loved both of them, Rose being one of my closest friends, and Emmett my late husbands brother. I knew Rose would take it hard though. I remembered when he came sauntering over to me, Alice, and Rose. His eyes were no longer detached and bored, but arrogant. He was suddenly looking at me as though I were some sort of conquest, something to be defeated. It was then I saw my dad had been right. Edward had turned into some sort of womanizer. With that in mind, I gave him answers as short as possible so he didn't mistake me for being interested. Also, I did get some satisfaction from having a successful dance career like Edward said I never would.

Then there was the trip to deliver the presents and Emmett's car to Rose and Emmett's house. He obviously figured out who I was because he addressed me by my childhood nickname. I stepped on my breaks in a display of my anger at being addressed that way. Bella was left here in Jamestown when I started my ballet career. As Isabella, I was strong, beautiful, graceful, and confident. As Bella, I was a child; shy, naieve, and a total klutz without ballet slippers on. After that small incident though, the rest of the drive back to the Athenaeum was comfortable, and fun even. Whether he realized it or not, his old personality; the charming, care-free Edward came through. His smile was genuine and his eyes bright for the first time.

I'm not sure where on the drive, but at some point, I understood something. The detached cynic, and slightly arrogant guy was just a front, a defense mechanism if you will. If I had to venture a guess, I'd say the facade was for his family; Rose, Emmett, Carlisle, Esme, Alice, and Jasper. I'd meant what I'd said to him about believing that the person he portrayed wasn't the real Edward. He looked surprised, but he new what I was talking about. He wasn't used to having someone see through his act. I'd called his bluff but he wasn't running, wasn't angry. He wanted to be called out. He wanted somone to see that he was more than what meets the eye.

With all this in mind, I resolved to talk with my mom, Renee, as the lights of Rochester greeted me.

Within minutes I reached my mom and Phil's house. I took a second to send Edward a text letting him know Riley and I had made it safe and sound. His smiley face response came almost immediately after I sent the message. I had a sudden vision of him sitting by his phone, checking it every few minutes. I just laughed and shook my head at that and got out of my car. Within seconds of my car door closing, my mom was out of the house and running towards me.

"Bella! So glad you finally made it. Where's Riley bug?" She rushed out before taking a breath.

"Hey mom. Riley's still in the car in her car seat." I replied, rolling my eyes.

Next thing I knew, the back seat door was open and Renee was hauling Riley's car seat awkwardly out. I said a quiet hello to Phil who was standing on the front porch watching us. I pulled my duffel bag, pillow, and the diaper bag from the trunk of my car then pushed the button to close automatically.

"So how's life treating you Bella?" Asked Renee when we got inside.

"Pretty good." I replied.

"How's work going?" She asked taking her seat on the love seat.

"Good. Busy, but good. I have some offers on the table that I'm considering." I replied.

"What kind of offers?" Mom asked curiously.

"I can't really talk about them unfortunately, but there is one I'm looking heavily into the details on." I said.

"Can't you give us just a general idea as to what you're considering?" Mom pressed.

"Possibly a once in a lifetime opportunity with one of my favorite bands." I responded carefully. I know that if I accept it, my parents weren't going to be thrilled.

"Well, good luck." Phil responded quietly.

One of the things I liked about Phil was that he was quiet, but slow to judge. Therefore he'd show support without all the facts if he thought it'd make me and Riley happy.

"Thanks." I replied warmly at him.

Phil stood, stretching and yawning. "I think I'll go to bed and let you ladies catch up." He said.

"Good night honey." Mom responded giving him a quick peck on the cheek.

"Night Phil." I said.

"Glad you girls made it safe kiddo." Phil responded before going up the stairs to their bedroom.

"So how was the wedding?" Mom asked once Phil had gone up.

"It was good, very grand, just like Rose wanted." I replied with a wry smile.

Mom had met Rose a couple of times. Once when she came to New York City to watch me perform, and again at mine and Ryan's wedding which Rose was a bridesmaid in.

"I'm sure she made a lovely bride for Emmett." Mom replied warmly. "Was Edward there?"

I had expected that question because even though she'd never met him, I spoke of him often to her, sometimes needing advice since we were still in school. She knew about the argument that had ended our childhood friendship and had comforted me for days after.

"He was." I replied simply.

"You look like you have something on your mind." My mom commented.

"I don't know. He's changed a lot." I started. "For some reason he keeps up a front for his family that's not really him."

I let my head flop back so I was staring at the ceiling. I was back to trying to figure out Edward Cullen.

"How do you know the 'front' he shows isn't the real him?" Mom asked curiously.

"I had to give him a ride back to the reception site after he drove the gifts to Rose and Emmett's, and he gave me glimpses of who he really is." I replied.

"But why would he keep a front up if he was just going to let it crack to you?" She asked.

"I don't know, I have a feeling it's mostly for his families benefit because something bad happened to him." I replied.

"But why his family?" Mom pressed.

"As much as I love the Cullens, they can be a bit, uh, pushy." I started carefully. "They were always encouraging Edward to have a 'high school sweetheart' if you will, which a lot of times was supposed to be me. Someone he'd date in high school, go to college with, marry, have kids with, the whole enchilada. He fell for it once, and that's why we had the argument that we did. My guess is that he fell for it again while in college, and he got hurt, so he does this so they don't try it again."

"Oh." Mom replied.

I think I might have overwhelmed her with information.

"I can sympathize for him having to have that forced upon him, and at such a young age too." She said.

"I kind of feel like I turned my back on him in a way when I left. I said still staring at the ceiling.

"Why angel girl?" Mom replied.

"Because we had that argument and because I left almost directly after. I left him to be influenced like that more without help." I said.

"Isabella Marie." Mom said sharply making me cringe. "What was it I always told you to do when you were growing up?"

"To go for my dreams if that's what would make me happy because my happiness should not hinge on the happiness of others." I recited.

"And is that what you did?" Mom asked.

"Yes mom, and I'm absolutely in love with my career." I said.

"So, why feel guilty about how another person chose to live his life after one very stupid argument?" She replied.

"You've got a point. We were young, but technically adults at the time."" I said.

"Exactly, so you did what made you happy, what continues to make you happy. Revel in that because you're damn good at what you do." Mom replied.

"Thanks mom, you've always been good at putting things into perspective for me." I said lookingher in the eye.

It was true, whenever I needed some perspective that Charlie couldn't give me, I called mom, and she always listened and helped.

"Hey what are moms for?" She asked playfully.

With that I knew the heavy stuff was over. We spent the next couple of hours after drinking hot chocolate and eating Reeses cups. Mom had turned on re-runs of Warehouse 13 which I got hooked on immediately. Two episodes later, we called it a night and headed to bed. I checked my phone for missed calls and/or texts. I had a text message from Edward.

**Hey Bella...looking forward to getting to know you again -E**

I smiled sending my reply: **Same here :) you know you can't bullshit me -B**

My phone beeped at me with a text before I could finish getting my pajamas on.

**Yeah...never could bullshit you...but its been years so my bullshit might've gotten better ;) -E**

I stifled a laugh at his response.

**Yeah right...deep down you re still bad at bullshitting me -B**

I was grinning ear to ear at our playful banter when I crawled into bed.

**No way...I am definitely better -E**

At that I burst out laughing hysterically.

**Oh really now? I'm a human bullshit detector -B**

I had to admit, the playful texts were fun. It was very reminiscent of how we were in hight school. I just shook my head at the memories.

My phone beeped again, and I opened the message as quick as I possibly could.

**Haha I highly doubt that... you d have to have a super power -E**

Thinking back to the show Warehouse 13, I typed back my response: **I could you know...like the new guy on Warehouse 13...he's a human lie detector -B**

I couldn't wait for his response since I just let my inner geek out. I didn't have to wait long.

**Wtf is Warehouse 13? -E**

I snorted at his lack of an inner geek.

**It's a TV show on syfy -B**

Less than 2 minutes later: **Since when do you watch syfy? -E**

**Since forever! star trek...star wars...eureka...torchwood...and now warehouse 13 -B**

**Huh...never knew you were a nerd...which star trek is the best? -E**

I was hoping he wasn't counting the original.

**Including the original or not? -B**

**Not including the original duh! Everyone knows captain Kirk was THE best -E**

I guess we do have something in common after all.

**Duh Kirk was the best...but after him is a tie between Picard and Janeway -B**

**Picard was awesome...but how did I know you'd like the female captian? lol -E**

**What? are you saying she was a bad captain because Janeway was a she? -B**

**Hell no...just it doesn't surprise me that you like her as a captain...you re a lot like her -E**

His response confused me. What on earth was he getting at?

**Oh...how do you figure? -B**

I waited anxiously for his reply. Of course this one had to take the a big longer to receive. I was beginning to think I wasn't going to get one when my phone finally beeped at me.

**You are both strong, independent, beautiful women whose very presence commands respect -E**

Huh. Didn't know he thought so highly ov me in such few short hours of getting re-aquainted.

**I'm just going to take that as a compliment Cullen -B**

I noticed after I sent that message that the time was nearing 1 am. Suddenly I was extremely tired and wanted nothing than just to get some sleep.

**You should Bella because it was :) -E**

**That's good...I'd hate to have to kick your ass ;) -B**

**Haha...would pay money to see that :) -E**

**Don't mock the dancer :) ps going to sleep now...need my beauty rest ya know -B**

**Whatever Bella...goodnight -E**

**Good night...btw don't think I haven't been counting the number of times you've called me Bella -B**

**Then don't sign off as B and I won't :)...Cullen over and out...sleep good -E**

Needless to say, I fell asleep with a smile on my face.

**A/n: So there you have it! A little heavy, a little light. I won't beg for reviews, but if you feel like leaving one GO FOR IT! :D**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/n: Dear readers, I am back with another chapter. There's a lot of information in this chapter, a look into Edward's head and his perspective into the past. I hope you enjoy it!**

**Ch. 3**

**EPOV**

It had been 2 weeks since my sisters wedding, two weeks since Bella had come back into my life. This meant I'd met with Alice 2 times. She'd put me back on weekly meetings for a while.

Bella and I did still text on an almost daily basis. We had fun, but never got into any deep conversations. We both seemed to be on the same page that the deep stuff should be talked about in person instead of over text.

My work rotation finally gave me an opportunity to have that lunch date with Bella. I was currently having a staring contest with my phone which was lying on the coffee table in front of me. Suddenly I was nervous. What the hell would I do if she turned me down? Alice warned me at our last meeting that if I chickened out, she'd be personally kicking my ass.

I looked at the clock on the table next to the love seat. It was only 9:45 in the morning. My only choices were risk being turned down, or get my ass kicked by Alice. With a heavy sigh, I grabbed my cell phone and opened a new message.

**Bella...I remember something about a lunch "date". Care to join me for lunch? E**

I sent the message then turned on my TV. I found a CSI Miami marathon on, so I settled in to watch for a while. I heard my phone og off at the beginning of the next episode. My heart rate picked up at the sound, and I started sweating. This was the moment of truth. I hit pause on the TV remote then picked up my phone. I took a deep breath then opened the message.

**Well...I was wondering when you were gonna ask ;)...I have a meeting at 10:30 scheduled but that should be done by noon. B**

I hadn't realized I was holding my breath until I let out a relieved sigh. I re-read the text and laughed lightly at the first part of her response. I guess I was worried for nothing. I hit reply and asked her where she'd like to meet. The response I got from her was almost immediate.

**Meet me at my office...corner of 3rd and Spring...4th floor...last door to the right. B**

**Ok...I'll see you at your office at noon then. E**

I didn't realize I was smiling until after I sent my last response. I was going to see Bella in less than 2 hours.

Instead of restarting my CSI Miami marathon, I shut off the TV and headed for a shower.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~DAWMH~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

An hour later I was headed to meet Bella at her office freshly showered and shaved. I wondered how lunch was going to go. I wondered what her office looked like, what she was wearing, if she had her own secretary. A million thoughts swirled through my head, and I had no answer for any of them.

I don't know how, but in my haze of unanswered questions, I managed to drive to and park safely in front of the Infinity group building. I cut the engine then took a few deep calming breaths. About 2 minutes later, I was in the elevator headed for the fourth floor.. I was fidgeting with the cuffs on my black button up shirt. I was nervous.

_You're more than nervous idiot. Don't downplay it!_ My damn inner voice yelled at me.

The bell dinged, and the doors opened on the fourth floor. The hall I stepped into was unassuming in itself with white walls, closed wooden doors made from different woods, and windows on either end of the hallway.

I walked to the last door which had a gold plated plaquard that read _Isabella Swan; Director of Ballet_. I took another calming breath and opened the door. There were 2 floor to ceiling windows to my right as well as a couple of comfortable looking arm chairs. In front of me was a cherry wood desk with a girl behind it. The girl wasn't Bella because this girl had straight, jet black hair that was only shoulder length. As I approached her desk, she instinctively glanced up at me through her thick white rimmed glasses.

"Can I help you?" She asked kindly. "You look lost."

"I'm here to meet Isabella for lunch." I responded shoving my hands in my jeans pockets.

"What's your name?" She asked with a small smile.

"Edward Cullen" I responded.

"Thanks." She replied writing my name down on a notepad. "I will let Isabella know you're here."

I smiled my response and sat down in one of the arm chairs. They really were as comfortable as they looked. I listened to the secretary talk into the phone on her desk. I heard my name and an "uh huh" then the click of the phone being hung up.

"Mr. Cullen, she'll be right out. Her meeting is almost done." The girl said.

I thanked her and turned to stare out of one of the windows. Outside people were going about their lives, rushing in and out. It was interesting to me how people form habits for their every day life. I tried counting how many American made versus foreign cars drove by, but I gave that up almost as fast as I started.

Ten minutes later, a door I hadn't noticed behind the girl at the desk opened. A man walked out first. He had on bondage pants and a black button up shirt, and his wrists had studded cuffs on them. He had long blond hair, but what gotme more than the outfit was the fact his eyes were lined with eyeliner. I felt one eyebrow raise when I suddenly caught sight of Bella. She looked stunning in her black dress pants paired with a red satin dress shirt. Her long hair was in ringlets with the front pulled back with a bobby pin. She looked positively stunning.

The blond guy shook her hand and said something to her in a very thick accent of some sort. She nodded and said something in reply and smiled. Then the blond turned and walked out. She then turned to face me and smiled.

"Edward, good to see you again." She said walking over to me.

I stood and we shook hands. "Same ms. Swan." I replied smirking at her.

She winked at me before speaking again. "Well, let me just grab my purse and lock up the office and we can go." She said.

"Okay." I replied.

I stood in the same spot while she locked up and gave the secretary orders to forward any calls to her cell phone. Then she turned to me again; "let's get some lunch." She said lightly.

"Definitely." I agreed.

She led the way to the elevator, and I followed. We were silent while we walked to the Taco Hut which was across the street from her workplace. We requested a seat for 2 at the same time. We laughed a little at that while we followed the hostess to a table near a window. When we sat down I sighed.

"Beautiful day." Bella ovserved.

"Yeah, not bad for western New York." I agreed.

"So how's life for the newest doctor Cullen?" Bella asked sitting back in her chair.

"Busy as ever." I replied. "Everyone seems to be having hearing problems in this town."

Bella laughed at what I'd said, her chocolate brown eyes lighting up like Christmas tree lights. "Sounds like you've been kept busy then." She commented.

"How about you?" I asked. "How's the ballet career?" I was being genuine with my question, nt snarky, and I hoped she would know that.

"It's wonderful. I have a very serious offer on the table currently that I may be accepting." She replied.

"Wow, congrats!" I said. "I take it the offer had something to do with your meeting this morning?"

She studied my face looking for something for a moment. Once she found whatever she was looking for, she responded. "Yes, the meeting this morning was so that I could get some details that weren't included with the original proposal. You saw Eicca Toppinen leaving my office."

I sank back in my seat. I knew the name, and I knew what band he was from. To say I was star-struk wouldn't be an understatement. "Holy shit. I'm suitably impressed." I said.

She smiled at me. "I thought you might, but since this is a catch up lunch, let's focus on other things." She said lightly.

The waitress appeared at that moment to take our order. I ordered a meat and cheese burrito and a pepsi, and Bella ordered a grilled steak burrito and a strawberry daquiri.

"Other dancers would kill for my metabolism." She commented with a laugh when the waitress hurried off to put in our order.

I smirked at her comment. "So, can I ask a question that's a little over nine years too late?" I asked nervously.

"Go for it." She responded, hands folded on the table top. She looked the epitome of proffesionalism.

"Why did you leave so suddenly? After our argument I mean."

I heard her deep sigh, and her eyes suddenly looked a little wattery. "I saw the look in your eyes during our last argument. You wanted nothing to do with me going to school for dance, even though that's what made me happy." She replied bringing the fingertips of one hand to her lips.

"I was going to apologize to you the day you left." I said quietly.

"What?" She asked.

"I realized that I was wrong when you stopped speaking to me. A few days after trying to get you to speak to me, I decided to go to Charlie's to apologize to you in person, but you were already gone." I replied.

"Then why? Why did you do it?" She asked.

I could tell she was fighting back tears, and I hated myself in that moment. "My mom." I started.

I pausd while our drinks were set down in front of us. "Esme?" She asked, a tone of mild surprise coloring her voice.

"Yes, my mom." I replied. "You remember how perception of others played a huge roll in her life?" Bella nodded.

I had the feeling she knew where I was going with this, but was allowing me to say it for myself. "She found out that I liked you and convinced me that in order for us to be together, that you needed to choose a more 'suitable' career." I said making air quotes around the word suitable. Saying everything out loud for the first time made me realize how gullible I'd been.

"So you lashed out at me." She finished.

"I'm so sorry Bella, I never should have listened to her." I said looking down at my lap.

"Hey." She said placing her hand on my shoulder.

I looked up at her through watery eyes.

_Shit. Now I'm just plain weak. Good going Edward._

"I understand Edward. You were young, hell we both were. It's not your fault that you were manipulated into something like that."

I let her words sink in. She wasn't mad at me, and she wasn't holding it against me.

_This woman is amazing!_

"So wait, you're not mad at me?" I asked incredulously.

"Not anymore." She replied.

"Wow, you really are an amazing woman Bella." I said honestly. "So what about college? Did you have fun?"

I wanted to move on from the painful topic we'd been discussing.

"I absolutely loved Julliard. It was awesome to be challenged in order to become better at my art." She replied with a wide smile that lit up her eyes again.

"I'm glad you liked it. You said you were with the ABT. What the hell is the ABT?" I asked.

"ABT stands for American Ballet Theatre. It's the most elite dance company for ballet dancers. They dance the best ballet performances in the best theatres in the United States." She said.

"Oh." I replied. "How long were you with them?"

"About three and a half years. I left when I married Ryan." She replied. "Ryan and I were married for a little over a year when I found outI was pregnant. He was deployed 2 months later, and killed a month and a half later by a suicide bomber, a child suicide bomber."

I sank back in my chair absorbing what she'd just told me.

"Since his death, Rosalie moved in with me in Rochester, and helped me through the remainder of my pregnancy, then after Riley was born, Emmett and Rose helped me with moving back here."

Well great, now I will forever be indebted to my sister and brother-in-law for bringing Bella back to me.

"Enough about me Edward. What about you?" She asked finishing off her lunch.

"Well, I went to the State University at Buffalo for pre-med, graduated there with a 4.0 GPA, then I went to Johns Hopkins for my medical degree." I said.

"What's your specialty doctor Cullen?" She asked.

I laughed outright at the phrasing of her question. "Well ms. Swan, I am a doctor of audiology, specifically pediatric audiology."

She looked at me with the most surprised expression I've ever seen. "No way." She replied breathily.

"You look like you've just seen a ghost."" I commented. "What's wrong?" I asked covering her ice cold hand on the table.

"You may be a God send to me! Riley is deaf." She said.

_Holy fuck!_

**A:n/ Well another chapter done! What did my readers think? Can anyone guess which band Bella eluded to earlier? :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/n: Hello readers! I'm sure you're all thinking 'it's about time' and yeah, I agree with you! Sorry it took me so long to get this story updated. There's a lot going on right now and with my computer STILL not working it's hard to get this updated as fast as I want to. I've also been doing a lot of travelling and some research for material. But enough of my rambling…on with the story!**

**Ch. 4**

**BPOV**

I was having a wonderful time catching up with Edward; I'd stopped paying attention to the time. Luckily for me, I'd set an alarm to remind me when I needed to leave for the Buffalo airport to pick up Rose and Emmett. I jumped in surprise when it went off.

"That your boyfriend Bella?" Edward asked jokingly.

"No, don't have one of those." I replied laughing. "It's my reminder to go pick up Rose and Emmett from the airport and bring the newly weds home."

"Oh, okay." He replied. "Sorry for keeping you so long."

"It's perfectly fine." I said. "In fact, I've had fun. Would you like to ride out with me?"

_Woah there Bella! Where the hell did that come from?_

"Sure, I'd love to ride to Buffalo with you." Edward replied.

"Well okay then. Let's hit the road." I said standing up.

Edward followed me all the way to my car and got in the passenger seat as I got into the drivers seat. There was a surprisingly comfortable silence between us for most of the drive. It wasn't until the Glee version of Defying Gravity from Wicked the musical that Edward broke the silence between us with a groan.

"And here I thought your taste in music had improved." He commented jokingly.

"Hey now!" I exclaimed. "What's wrong with Glee? Or Wicked for that matter."

"First off, I have no idea what or who Wicked is, but Glee is a stupid ass show." He responded.

I started laughing at his response which I just couldn't help. "What is so funny Miss. Swan?" He asked with a smirk on his handsome face.

"Firstly, Wicked is a musical, more specifically a huge, very popular Broadway musical, and secondly, Glee is a fuck-awesome show." I replied with a smile.

"Whatever you say." He replied with a laugh. "So, when will I get the opportunity to see you dance?"

I knew I should've been expecting the question, but I couldn't stop the rush of happiness at hearing it. The last time he'd seen me dance was my final practice for my admissions try out for Julliard. I remembered the judges' surprise when I'd successfully pulled off a routine to David Garrett's version of Beethoven's 5th symphony. It had been a calculated risk, but one that had paid off greatly.

"Well, should I decide to go forward with Eicca's offer, I will have to choreograph a routine to one of their songs and present it to them. Should I go through with that, you'd be allowed to watch my presentation. I replied.

"What is stopping you from going forward?" Edward asked quietly.

"Riley and her hearing issue." I replied automatically. My head is automatically programmed to consider my daughter first. "I'd have to ensure that she will be able to be treated for her hearing like she is now."

Edward seemed to be deep in thought, chin resting in his hand, head turned so he was staring out of the window at the passing scenery of downtown Buffalo.

"Edward, what are you thinking about over there?"

He started at the sound of my voice. It was almost as if he'd zoned out on me. "Bella, I might be able to work something out. All I need to know to look into things is if Riley has been fitted for her hearing aids yet."

Hope bloomed in my chest at his words. It was a feeling I'd barely allow myself to feel before. "She hasn't yet, no. I'm still trying to get her ear, nose, throat doctor to sign off on them." I replied quickly.

"Okay, when you get a chance, write down the name of the doctor for me, and I will get that process started for you." He said with a smile.

"Are you serious?" You're really willing to help me and my little girl?" I asked as my eyes started tearing up.

Edward reached over and covered the hand resting on the shifter. "Yes Bella, absolutely. You're not alone." He replied gently.

I parked the car in the airport parking garage and then leaned over the center console and hugged Edward. In that moment, he was my hero, and before I could stop myself, I started falling for him all over again after so many years apart. The hug didn't last long enough before both of us were exiting the car. My cheeks felt warm to the touch, so I knew I was blushing. Unfortunately my blush lived on my face when I wasn't working. Most of the time anymore it was exacerbated by Emmett. I found myself crossing my fingers as I walked hoping he wouldn't refer me by the ridiculous nickname he'd made up for me the first time Ryan had taken me home to meet his family.

We rounded a corner in the airport and saw Emmett and Rosalie walking toward us. When he caught sight of us, he broke out his best smile.

"It's-a-Bella-rina!" Emmett called out in a fake Italian accent. _Ugh_. Next thing I knew, I was wrapped in one of his massive bear hugs while Edward hugged his sister gently.

"Need…to…breathe…Em" I choked out. Emmett did release me from the hug, but swing his arm up to rest around my shoulders.

"So is anyone going to ask how the honeymoon went?" Emmett asked while we walked towards the baggage claim area.

"Well, I'm simply going to assume it went well seeing as you both came back, and still married." Edward said matter-of-factly.

Emmett opened his mouth for some sort of response but I interrupted him. "Emmett, no. Please save Edward and I the need to bleach our brains when we get to our respective homes." I said.

"But what fun would that be sissy?" Emmett asked winking down at me.

"She's right Emmett." Rosalie spoke up, and I sighed in relief. "They don't need to know that we never left our hotel room so there are no publicly viewable honeymoon photos."

I stopped dead in my tracks gawking at Rosalie, while a ghostly pale Edward gagged loudly. "That was seriously awesome Rosie!" Emmett exclaimed high-fiving her.

"Edward I'm so sorry." I said quietly fixing my attention on him.

"What for Bella?" He asked, surprise lacing his tone.

"It seems my crude brother-in-law here has rubbed off on your sister Rose." I said keeping a straight face.

Edward flashed me a magnificent crooked smile at my come back. "Oh momma Bella, I'm just so awesome, I'm contagious." Emmett replied.

"You wish brother bear." I replied, rolling my eyes.

"Wait and see my dear when Riley gets bigger." Emmett said.

"No! You won't influence my angel that way!" I replied with a death glare at Emmett. As soon as Emmett brought Riley into the conversation I'd had enough. Edward and I gravitated to chairs by the windows at the baggage claim area while Emmett and Rose went to retrieve their bags. We sat down and waited for Emmett and Rosalie and their bags in silence.

I was annoyed with Emmett, and by extension Rose for egging him on. Edward seemed to sense my tension, but never pressed it. He just sat next to me. Waiting with Edward, the silence was again comfortable, not awkward. We apparently never needed to fill our time with idle conversation. After a couple of minutes like this, I started to feel calm again.

"How did you do that?" I asked Edward.

"Do what?" He asked back.

"Ease the tension all of the sudden." I replied.

"I don't know honestly. I could ask you the same thing too." He said and I blushed.

"Touché" I replied, and we lapsed into silence again.

A few short minutes later, Rose and Emmett returned with their bags. "You ready to go ass?" Edward asked Emmett.

"Dude, what crawled up your butt and died?" Emmett replied, ignoring Edward's question.

"Nothing, I just want to go home." Edward said very shortly. I had to wonder if the change in Edward's attitude was an act for Emmett's sake or if he was really that annoyed at Emmett. Unfortunately I couldn't get a read on him at that moment.

"Whatever dude." Emmett replied.

The remainder of the walk to my car was spent in silence and not a comfortable one by far. I wished there was something I could say to fix things. I didn't like how closed off Edward was again. That was the most frustrating part. If Emmett hadn't opened his big ass mouth, this wouldn't have happened. I think my nickname is cursed. It aggravated Ryan to the point of a fight between the brothers. I internally groaned in frustration and picked up my pace. I wanted to get to my car and home as soon as possible. I wanted to be home before I took my frustrations out. No one, including my late husband has ever seen me break down. That is not something I ever plan on changing.

We got to my car and without speaking, I popped the trunk open and Emmett loaded their bags in. While he did, Edward, Rose, and I got into our seats, Edward in the passengers seat, and Rose behind me on the drivers side. Emmett finally got in the car and I headed for Jamestown. When no one attempted to break the silence after a few minutes, I turned my iPod back on. The first song that came on was Walking Disaster by Sum 41. It pretty much summed me up. I glanced at Edward through my peripheral vision. He was staring out of the windshield with a deep frown on his face. His elbow was propped up on the door handle and he was holding his head up with his palm. He looked troubled about something, but what, I had no idea.

I glanced at Emmett and Rose through my rear view mirror. Rosalie was asleep, her hear on Emmett's shoulder, and Emmett was staring out the window, his arm around his wife's shoulders. It made my heart melt and hurt all at the same time. I forced myself to look away before my eyes started tearing up again. I so did not want anyone to see my tears. There'd be time for them later when no one would be around to see or hear them.

My iPod then changed songs to Save You by Simple Plan. I knew I wanted to be that person they were singing about for Edward. _Sigh._ If only he wouldn't put that damn front up when I was around. I hated that Edward and I felt an irrational rage and urge to throttle the person who created that persona. My suspicions would be an ex girlfriend, but only Edward could confirm or deny that. I noticed Edward suddenly looking at me in my periphery while I shifted lanes on the thruway.

I moved my face to actually glance at him, but he just looked back out the windshield again with a sigh. I swallowed my frustration and concentrated on the road again. The next hour passed in a blur of broken lines, signs, and car lights as I drove us towards home.

The silence was finally broken when I decided to take Route 60 into downtown Jamestown instead of turning to go the back roads to our houses. "Aren't we going home?" Emmett asked.

"Yeah, eventually. First though, I have to get Edward back to his car so he can go to his home." I replied.

"Oh, okay." Emmett said. "By the way Bells, I'm sorry about earlier at the airport."

"It's okay Emmett." I replied.

"I meant no harm you know?" He said.

"Yeah I know." I replied smiling. Despite the goofball Emmett is more often than not, he always comes through for me, and does have a conscience. He gave me a big goofy grin in return and I knew we were all good again. "So back to the grind tomorrow?" I asked conversationally.

"Oh hells no, I planned this so I get a 3 day weekend home before going back to work." He replied.

"What about Rose?" I asked.

"She's going to work for half of the day tomorrow and then take the weekend." Emmett said.

"Fun." I replied.

"Oh yeah, you working tomorrow?" He asked.

"Yep, I've got some mind numbing office work to do in the morning, and then I'll be at the Reg working on some choreography in the afternoon." I said.

"Got something cooking in that head of your Bella?" Emmett asked.

"Of course I do. A lot of creative ideas are floating in my head." I replied.

"Ooh sounds promising." Emmett said.

"Let's hope so Em." I replied with a sigh.

"You want to talk about it?" He asked.

"Nope, I can't talk about it technically." I explained. I was frustrated at the fact I couldn't tell my family what I was working on. The only one who had a clue was Edward, and I could only hope he wouldn't say anything.

"Oh, well, I'm sure whatever you come up with will be perfect." Emmett replied.

"I hope so Em, I hope so." I said with a sigh.

"You're not doubting your talent are you Bells?" Rose asked quietly.

_Huh, I didn't know she'd woken up_ I thought. "Not really, I just have to be perfect with the choreography and how I execute it. The execution for me is not an issue but coming up with perfect moves that can easily be adapted to different scenarios." I explained.

"Well, for as cryptic as that was, it makes sense I guess." Emmett replied.

"Look, I wish I could tell you guys but I just can't!" I exclaimed. My frustration had finally came to a head. "My job and the offers I receive rely solely on discretion until I am given permission by the person, or persons making the offer. Until then, I'm bound by confidentiality agreements."

"Whoa Bells, I'm so sorry. I had no idea." He replied after the end of my rant.

"I know Em, and I'm sorry too. I should've explained everything in the first place." I replied.

Too much pressure, too many mysteries, and my hopes on the line were wearing me thin. I guess with everything going on, I was forgetting to actually talk to my friends who were like family. I must seem ridiculous to them. I barely resisted the urge to bounce my head off of the steering wheel as I mad the last turn that would take us to Edward's car. He'd been silent the entire ride back but I was too tired to figure out why.

"Which car is yours Edward?" I asked him.

"It's the silver Pacifica with a stethoscope hanging from the rearview mirror." He replied in a low, monotone voice. I spotted his car immediately and pulled up behind it.

"Thanks for riding out with me." I said.

"Not a problem." He replied before opening the passenger door and getting out.

I watched him shut the door and get into his car before Rose came around and occupied the seat he'd sat in the entire ride out and back. I barely noticed the drive to pick up Riley from Alice and Jasper's and the drive to our homes which were next door to each other. I actually didn't register much until Riley was safely sleeping in her crib, and I was in my pajamas climbing into bed. Words and scenes then passed through my head leaving me with painful questions that I wanted answers to.


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello readers, I'm back again! As anticipated here is the next chapter!**

**Just as a reminder, even though everybody already knows, I don't own Twilight in any shape or form, Stephanie Meyer does, but I do own the notebook I'm currently writing this story in :)**

**Ch. 5**

**EPOV**

Bella had just dropped me off at my car and left, leaving me with a jumble of thoughts I couldn't make any sense out of. I think I'm beginning to become even more attracted to her, so much that some small part of mewanted her to be mine, which scares the shit out of me. I gently rested my forehead on the steering wheel and let out a deep breath. I would spend the night here if I continued muddling through things here in my car, so I started the engine and drove home. When I got to my apartment, I parked on the street out front and dragged my ass up the one flight of stairs to my second floor apartment.

When the door shut, I dropped back against it with a sigh. No matter what I tried to do about it, attraction, strong, scary, and honestly mildly unwanted had lodged itself in my heart. Hoping though to distract myself, I turned on my TV to re-runs of Frasier and booted up my laptop. While I waited, my mind drifted to Bella without my permission. I could still clearly picture the curls in her hair, and the amusement in her chocolate brown eyes on the rid out to Buffalo. Admittedly, it was the best ride I'd been on in a long time. Even the silence between us was comfortable. She was able to put me completely at ease, and without having to do anything.

I shook my head at that, trying to clear my head entirely. By this time my computer had booted up and my e-mail open. I noticed one from Rosie C, who I was knew was Rosalie, but didn't know why she'd be e-mailing me, she hardly did that anymore now that we live in the same town. Hell she texted me more than she e-mailed me. OUt of extreme curiosity, I opened her e-mail message first.

I noticed first there was an attachment, but decided to read the message first;

_Edward, Emmett here, don't forget mom and dad C's anniversary party tomorrow. Remember that they asked you to play piano. They even asked Jasper and Bella to sing for them. Should be interesting ;) Rose has something she wants to say, so later bro. ~Emmett_

_Edward, Rose here. I wanted to apologize to you for earlier. Emmett you know now, can get carried away, and I guess I pride myself on putting him in his place, but tonight I let myself down. I was too much on a honeymoon high maybe. Yes, we apologized to Bella, an yes she has forgiven us, so you can too. Didn't think I'd noticed, huh big brother? I love you and I love her and it's been obvious for YEARS that you are both meant for each other. Attached to this message is a song I heard and immediately thought of you two. Hopefully it'll inspire you to do something. By the way, Bella will kill me for giving this to you, but her AIM sn is inluvwithhim19. Love you, Rose._

I sighed and ran my hands through my hair before downloading the attached song. It took less than 2 minutes to do. I muted the TV and pressed play as soon as it finished.

_Face to face and heart to heart  
>We're so close yet so far apart<br>I close my eyes, I look away  
>That's just because I'm not okay<br>But I hold on  
>I stay strong<br>Wondering if we still belong_

_Will we ever say the words we're feeling  
>Reach down underneath and tear down all the walls<br>Will we ever have our happy ending  
>Or will we forever only be prentending<em>

_Will we ah-ah-ah-always-ah-ah-ah-always  
>Ah-ah-ah-always be pretending<em>

_How long do I fantasize  
>Make believe that it's still alive<br>Imagine that I am good enough  
>And we can choose the one we love<br>But I hold on, I stay strong  
>Wondering if we still belong<em>

_Will we ever say the words we're feeling  
>Reach down underneath and tear down all the walls<br>Will we ever have our happy ending  
>Or will we forever only be pretending<em>

_Will we ah-ah-ah-always-ah-ah-ah-always  
>Ah-ah-ah-always be pretending<em>

_Keeping secrets safe  
>Every move we make<br>Seems like no one's letting go  
>And it's such a shame<br>Cause if you feel the same  
>How am I supposed to know<em>

_Will we-_

I paused the song after the bridge and slumped back on the couch. How the hell had Rose manage to peg my feelings? I pulled up my AIM and signed on. Seeing Rose online, I opened up a new chat.

**Hey Rosie**

_Hey Edward! Get my email?_

**Yep**

_Well?_

**What do you want me to say sis?**

_Whatever the hell you're thinking or feeling! When are you going to start living again?_

**What are you talking about? I am living**

_You are a damned robot Edward. That sure as shit wasn't the big brother I knew_

**Maybe I like being a "robot". Ever think about that baby sis?**

_No because if that were true, you wouldn't EVER deserve Bella, except I don't believe that's true at all. I call Bull Shit!_

**Whatever sis**

_Then why did you IM me after listening to Pretending?_

**I wanted to know where you heard it and who the artist is**

_Oh Edward, you may be able to fool mom & dad, and maybe even Jasper & Alice, but you can't fool me or Emmett even. You could've looked up the artists yourself online, so there's more to this than you're telling me, but I'll let that go for now. I heard it playing in Bella's car on our way home. It was done by Cory Monteith and Lea Michele from Glee_

**Thanks Rose**

_Not a problem. Can I make an observation?_

**I don't care I guess**

_I haven't seen my real big brother since before your friendship with Bella ended that fateful summer. After that, you were a shell of who you were, burying yourself in school work constantly. Then mom pushed you into getting together with that whore, Tanya. I don't know what she was doing or what she did to you, but while you were with her, you went on a self destructive spiral._

**Where are you going with this?**

_I'm almost done. When you guys finally broke up, you came back destroyed, and that's when you built up a "Wall of Protection" as a damned man whore. Still think you're fooling me dipshit?_

**I guess not...**

_DUH! I'm your sister. I love you. I'm going to warn you though, dad talks to Charlie even though he moved back to Seattle. If you think Charlie won't say anything to Bella, you've got your head stuck up your ass._

**Ugh, I give up. What should I do?**

_Well, Alice and I were thinking about getting us all to go out for karaoke after mom and dads anniversary party tomorrow night. YOu could do something romantic for her._

**Rose, that would mean me risking getting hurt. I don't think I'm exactly ready for that.**

_A. this is Bella we're talking about! B. Grow The Fuck Up! C. Bella's been hurt too (not that she'll admit that to anyone)_

I suddenly felt like I'd been hit by a truck._ Say what? Bella hurt?_ That hurt me just thinking about it. _Holy shit, where did that come from?_

_Let me put it this way bro, Emmett loved Ryan, her late husband, since they were brothers, but he knew his brother's faults. Bella won't confirm or deny if those faults manifestedthemselves during their marriage or not. All I know is that she doesn't talk about him or their marriageother than to tell people that she's a widow._

**Oh**

_Yeah_

Rose's wordes swirled around my head. I suddenly wondered what that fucker had done to my Bella. _Wait, what?_ She was not mine, never was really. OUr argument ended any chance of that. This is too damned complicated.

_You still there bro?_

**Yeah, just turning over what you told me in my head**

_Don't over think this Edward. Just do something, please!_

**Gotta figure out what to do. In the meantime, I've gotta go practice my piece for tomorrow and get to bed.**

_Okay, I'm headed to bed to. Getting up in the morning is gonna SUCK_

**Glad I'm not you**

_Shut it! Love you big brother_

**Love ya too sis, goodnight.**

With my goodnight sent, I logged out of AIM and my e-mail and shut down my computer. The TV was still muted so I went to the kitchen and grabbed a coke on my way to the spare bedroom where my keyboard was. My mom had asked me to play at their anniversary tomorrow, so I decided to play her favorite song, The Rose. My fingers moved effortlessly over the keys, coaxing the beautiful melody to fill the room with it's sound, and relaxed more with each note I played.

Piano always was a comforting thing for me, like a security blanket to a kid. Somehow I was comforted enough to feel invincible. _Bella's been hurt too_. Rose's words filtered through my suddenly clear mind. Good thing the fucker was dead because I'd kick his ass otherwise for hurting her. Which brings me to the question, what am I going to do to let Bella know I still have feelings for her?

I wondered what song her and Jasper would be singing. Suddenly an idea came to mind. I stopped playing and thought it all out. Once my plan had been formulated, I played through The Rose one last time then dragged my smiling ass to bed.

* * *

><p>The next morning came too quickly for me. I pried my eyes open to look at my iHome. 7:34 a.m. Ugh. How the hell am I even awake? I wondered what it was that had woke me when my phone started ringing. I figured that was what had woken me up. I fumbled with my phone for a second before I managed to hit the button to answer the call.<p>

"Hello?" I asked, sleep evident in my voice.

"Dr. Cullen?" It was Lauren, my receptionist. Unfortunately she had an unhealthy obsession with me.

"What is it Lauren? This better be good if you're calling me this early in the morning." I reply sharply.

"Dr. Taylor told me to call you into emergency. They have a deaf baby who may have an ear infection. Because of her hearing condition, they'd like you to examine her." Lauren replied.

"Okay, inform James that I'll be there in 20 minutes tops." I replied already dragging myself out of bed. "Also, double check and make sure my schedule is still clear today while I've got you on the phone."

"Yes Dr. Cullen." She said.

I was 3/4 of the way dressed in a pair of scrubs before Lauren confirmed that my schedule was free of appointments for the day. I thanked her then ended the cal. I'd gotten getting into my scrubs down to a science. I could have them on in less than 3 minutes and a cup of coffee in my travel mug ready to go in 5. I threw on my Nike's on last and I barreled out of the door.

Less than 10 minutes later, I was in the emergency room putting on a spare lab coat, waiting for Dr. James Taylor to fill me in. I sat in a chair at the nurses station and waited. Two minutes later I was getting annoyed. Three minutes after that I paged him using one of the phones at the nurses station. Three minutes later he showed up. His dirty blond hair was pulled in a low ponytail, there was a face mask half off, hanging from one ear, and blood on his scrubs.

"Victoria?" He called. Anurse with red, curly hair with brown roots showing appeared at his side.

"Yes Dr. Taylor?" She asked in a sickenlingly sweet voice.

"Please get me a new pair of scrubs from laundry. Today if you could." He barked at her.

"Yes Dr. Taylor" She rpelied, defeat evident in her tone. He then turned to me.

"Cullen, good of you to come in." He said shking my hand with a smile.

"Not a problem James. If you can point me to your patients chart, I can take it from there so you can get cleaned up." I said.

"Alright." He replied pulling the surgical mask from the one ear it'd been hanging on.

"What happened to you?" A nurse asked.

"Couldn't get a GSW patient to stop bleeding." James responded. "Oh and don't think I haven't noticed how late you are, again, Gayle."

The nurse gulped then paled where she sat in one of the chairs in front of a computer. I knew from talk James Taylor ran a tight ER with hight standards from the doctors and nurses under him. My guess is that she'd either be transferred to a different, less hectic part of the hospital, or she'd be fired. If she'd been on my staff, she'd have been fired. I smirked and leaned back in the chair I'd just sat in.

"Here ya go Cullen. Mom's hot by the way. Not that I'm supposed to notice." He said with a laugh, dropping the chart on the desk in front of me.

"Thanks man." I replied taking the chart from him.

I started for the exam room, but froze when I saw the patient name on the chart. _Biers, Riley L_. I skimmed over the chart information then knocked on the exam room door. I heard a soft "Come in" before I opened the door. I didn't meet Bella's eyes until after the door was closed.

She looked exhausted. Her hair was in a ponytail with numerous strands of hair pulled out of it hanging down in her face. She was wearing a form fitting black t-shirt and skinny jeans, with black jeweled flats. She was holding a teary eyed Riley who was still in her pj's and had a pacifier in her mouth.

"Hello there Dr. Cullen" She said weakly.

"Good morning Miss. Swan. What's going on with the little one?" I asked wanting to hear things in her words.

"Well, she was fussy last night starting around 1 this morning. I thought it could be from teething, so I gave her some baby tylenol, and that calmed her down after a few so her and I could get an hour of sleep. When I was getting her ready to go to daycare so I could go to work, I noticed that she was rubbing and pulling at her ears, she was also wiggling, but I didn't think too much about it. Walking out to the car, she started screeching worse than I'd heard her all night." She explained. "When I couldn't get her to calm down, I called in to work and came here. She's still inconsolable if I'm not holding her."

"Sounds very much like she has an ear infection. I just want to look to make sure." I said grabbing the scope to look in her ears from the wall.

"Can I hold her so she doesn't start the screeching and clawing at me again?" Bella asked.

"Absolutely." I replied maneuvering myself in front of her while Riley eyed me suspiciously.

Slowly, I reached for the baby and gently pinched the top of her ear to hold it, before inserting the scope into her ear. Two things happened simultaneously once the scope was in her ear. Riley's pacifier fell to the floor and she let out one hell of a shreek. Instinct had me recoiling, but I recovered to look in both ears and up her nose while Bella was able to hold her relatively still. Unfortunately her screams didn't let up, they only got louder as I looked in each orifice. By the time I was done, my ears were ringing, I'd determined the poor baby did indeed have a double ear infection, and poor Bella looked on the verge of tears herself.

"Well, unfortunately Riley has a double ear infection." I said and watched Bella's shoulders drop. I'm going to prescribe her an antibiotic and you can use baby tylenol for pain."

Bella nodded having put Riley's pacifier back in her mouth. Riley calmed again leaning against Bella with her hands on her ears.

If you'd like, we can giv her something slightly stronger which may knock her out for a little while. I offered seeing Bella and how defeated she looked.

"I think that'll help." She replied softly.

"Okay, I'll get a nurse to bring that in. It'll be given via shot in the leg for faster effect." I said, jotting down my notes in Riley's chart. "Bella, on a personal note, can I do anything to help you out?"

"I don't know." She replied, her voice betraying how close to crying she was. "I guess this really puts a kink in things for me today. I'm going to have to cancel going to your parents party I guess."

"What about this, I come over once I'm done here, help you out with little miss for the day, and I'll see about getting someone to watch Riley at your house tonight." I suggested.

"That's a tempting offer Edward, but I wouldn't feel right putting my burdens on you." She said lowering Riley to her car seat.

I knelt in front of her and placed a hand on her knee. It felt amazing, and so natural. The spark we used to have was still there. It made me happy, hopeful, for the fist time in a very long time. "YOu and little miss are no burded to me." I told her honestly.

"If you're sure, I'd appreciate the help." Bella replied with a small smile.

"I am sure. Tell you what I'm going to do. I'll have a nurse do Riley's injection while I write out her prescription and discharge paperwork. I"ll get you discharged as soon as I can and pick up her script from the pharmacy for you, and we'll meet back at your house. How does that sound?"

"I think that sounds okay to me as long as you're sure you'd like to do this. My house is the big white house next door to Emmett and Rose's." She said.

"Okay, when I pick up her script, I'll pick us up something for lunch." I replied standing up and grabbing the charg I had brought with me.

"Okay, sounds good, thank you." She said with a grateful smile.

"Anytime Bella." I told her sincerely. "I'll see you soon."

"Yeah, see you at the house I guess." She replied quietly. I smiled and exited the exam room, closing the door behind me.

I smiled to myself while I turned the injection order to the charge nurse, Candice, before going to the nurses desk to fill out Riley's discharge paperwork. First, I faxed a copy of the prescription I was ordering to the pharmacy listed in her chart, then I filled out the form with Riley's diagnosis and my instructions as the examining doctor and signed it. I put the hosptials copy in the char, and put it on the stack of other charts of discharged patients, grabbed Bella's copy of the discharge for amd dropped it off to her in the exam room. She smiled her thanks and showed me a sleeping Riley in her car seat. It made me so happy to see her relief.

Once she left, I searched out James and let him know Riley had been treated and discharged, and that I was leaving. He smiled and shook my hand with a quck thanks before going back to work. I sprinted down the hall and out to my car. My first top was to my apartment where I threw on a pair of medium wash denim jean shorts and a white t-shirt, and put my Nike sneakers back on. My second stop was at the pharmacy to pick up the prescription I had faxed to them, which they had already for me to pick up. Finally, I stopped at the grocery store to pick up ingredients for my tomato-feta pasta salad and Italian chicken.

An hour and a half after I left the hospital, I finally pulled into Bella's driveway. There was a screen door that opened to an enclosed porch that led to her front door. As I walked up, I noticed a note taped to the window;

_Edward, please leave your shoes on the porch. Riley is sleeping still in her car seat which I don't dare remove her from. I'm in the studio portion which is to the immediate left of this door through the laundry room. If you want, you can make yourself at home in the kitchen or living room. I'm working on choreography for a student and myself. My intern secretary Angela is here too, so if you hear me talking, it's to her not myself. Make yourself right at home. ~Bella_

I pulled the note from the door and opened it into her kitchen. I could vaguely hear her beautiful voice coming from my left, so I decided to take a peek. Bella had abandoned her Jeans and t-shirt for a spaghetti strap baby blue leotard, extremely short spandex shorts with ABT stiched in small letters at the hem of one leg, skin colored tights, and pale pink pointe shoes. Her hair had been pulled up in a bun with no loose hair anywhere.

The sight of her took my breath away. I leaned against the doorway and surveyed the room. The walls were painted an off white color wihch accented the light oak wood floor which was highly polished. One whole wall had floor to ceiling mirrors on it, and the wall opposite it had a barre attached. The walls that didn't have the mirrors had pictures and paintings of dancers. Some were of the Degas dancers which had me wondering if they were originals or copies. I was insanely impressed to say the least. I focused on Bella again who was trying out some intricate footwork. She moved so breathtakingly beautiful. So graceful, so fluid were her movements.

"Angela, write this down" She started once she'd finished dancing. "Arabesque to pique pirouette, to petit jete."

Upon hearing her voice speaking ballet terminology in a lightly french accent, my attraction to her instantly doubled. I backed out to her kitchen to fix our lunch before I did anything I'd regret later.

* * *

><p><strong>Final An: I want to give you guys a double update today because you are wonderful readers, however, I'm not sure how possible that is going to be. Have an emergency appointment with the pediatrician this afternoon (fingers crossed). If I can I will, if I can't, I'm sorry! Lots of love to my ever wonderful, ever faithful readers!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hi again readers. I did get to this just as I'd hoped. Hope you enjoy!**

* * *

><p><strong>Ch. 6<strong>

**BPOV**

I got Riley home from the hospital, and thanks to the injection Edward had ordered for her, she was sound asleep in her car seat. I didn't want to risk waking her up by taking her out of it, so I just carried the car seat to the nursery set up for her, and left her in it. I turned on the baby monitor and decided to work out of my home studio for as long as I could. I quickly changed and called Angela so that she could take notes for me. One of the routines I was choreographing was for her audition piece to Julliard.

While I waited for her to show up, I put on Claire De Lune and ran through my barre exercises to warm up. By the time I'd finished, Angela was sitting in a chair wearing black leggings, a royal blue "dress" style top, and ballet slippers with a small bow tied in the front.

"Thanks for coming Ang. I'm sorry for having you drive all the way out here, but I gotta work from home today." I said.

"It's not a problem Isabella." She replied. "What are we working on today?"

"I'm wanting to start choreographing your Julliard audition piece." I told her. "Have you picked out a song?"

"Yes, I picked David Garrett's version of Kashmir because you have been an inspiration to me and my dance career, and I want to be the type of dancer that you are." She replied.

"Good song choice, I'll be happy to come up with some wonderfully amazing choreography. Hopefully it'll be as good to you as it was to me." I told her with a gentle smile.

With that, I stuck David Garrett's Rock Symphonies CD into the CD player, then set it to replay Kashmir over and over. It took listening to the opening about 3 times before I got a visual of what I wanted to start out with. Fifteen minutes later, I was fine tuning preliminary moves. It was definitely a painstaking process of fine tuning my steps and putting my ideas together to form something beautiful that worked with the tones of the song. I was getting ready to put it all together when I noticed Edward leaning on the door jam watching me.

With that knowledge, I restarted the song from the beginning, and poured all of my concentration to the moves I wanted to execute so that they were perfect. I put 100% of myself into every single move, each one coming as easily as breathing. Graceful, fluid, and just plain perfect. I paused the track feeling elated that I finally got the first bit of the song choreographed just right.

"Angela, write this down." I said. She picked up her notebook and pen and nodded that she was ready. "Arabesque to pique pirouette, then petit jete."

Her pen flew over the page as she wrote down the moves I had done. I reered out of the corner of my eye and noticed Edward was gone from where he had been standing which made me sad. I'd been hoping that I impressed him with what I could do when dancing. No one had to tell me twice how he felt I guess.

"Ang, let's take a lunch break. I'll see if there's anymore I can coax out of this song after." I told her undoing the ribbons of my pointe shoes. I made sure once they were off that I pounded them out then bended the arch to keep them from going stiff on me. I had been blessed and cursed with high arches. It looked awesome up on pointe, well, even on demi pointe too, but it meant making sure my shoes were well pounded out, or my feet would hurt like hell once I was done dancing. Not that my feet didn't usually hurt a little after a day on my toes, literally.

Once my shoes were pounded out, I made my way to the kitchen where Edward was visiting with Angela while mixing up what looked like some sort of salad. I pulled my hair out of the pins that were holding it prisoner in a perfect but painful bun. _Beauty is a pain Bells._ I thought.

"How long have you been here?" I asked rounding the counter to get a bottle of Gatorade from the refrigerator.

"Not that long at all actually. Hell, the water on the stove isn't even boiling yet." He said jokingly. I laughed and stuck my tongue out at him. "Real mature Bella."

"I thought so." I replied with a wink. "So what are you making us?"

"I'm making a tomato-feta pasta salad, which is phenominal if I do say so myself, with Italian dressed chicken." He replied, opening a bottle of Italian dressing, and pouring it into a serving size bowl.

"You better hurry with getting that ready. Isabella's eyes are glazed over, and I'm pretty sure her saliva production is in overdrive, which means she'll start drooling at any second." Angela said with a laugh.

"You do realiz that I can hear perfectly what you're saying right?" I asked her with mischief evident in my tone.

"Yes Isabella, I do. You're the only ballerina I know who doesn't have to watch what she eats." Angela replied.

"Yeah, I've heard that before." I said rolling my eyes. "I've been told that ballerinas would kill for my metabolism."

"Whoever told you that was right Bella." Edward commented casually from his place at my stove.

"And you would know that, how?" I asked him.

"Two words Bella, med and school. I had to learn a small amount of each field before picking a specialty. I did a project for sports medicine on ballet dancers." He said with a slight blush tinging his cheeks.

"Wow, okay then, you do know a bit about us." I replied with pride.

"Yeah, that's why I argue that dancers are athletes. The time needed to be dedicated so muscles develop such fine control is astounding. That's how come you can be so strong, and so graceful as well while dancing but not walking." He explained.

"Wow, I'm suitably impressed Dr. Cullen." I said.

"Me too" Angela quipped from my side.

"Glad to know I impressed you two. You girls are a boost for my ego." He replied bowing in our direction.

Angela and I burst out laughing at him. It was nice to see him open up, and not only to me, but Angela as well. Despite her being my intern secretary and student, she'd become a good friend too. Before I could responde, mine and Edward's phones went off. Mine was R2D2 noises, and his was a boring ping sound. I unlocked my phone to see a text from Alice. I opened the text message and groaned.

_Karaoke tonight after big party. You all witll have to pick 2 songs to sing. Details later -A_

I hit the button to reply and typed in my response.

_Can't pixie. Riley's got an ear infection ~B_

Not even 2 minutes later R2D2 sounds were coming from my phone again. I didn't have to look to know it was from Alice again.

_You have a babysitter dear. Will send the details as to subject for your songs. Don't argue. -A_

I lightly banged my forehead on the granite countertop then replied to Alice.

_Fine pix. ~B_

I wondered who would be looking after my angel girl while I would be out. My eyes skimmed around my kitchen where they fell on Edward who was standing at the stove smirking at me.

"So what do you know about this Cullen?" I asked him raising an eyebrow.

"No idea what you're talking about, Swan." He replied.

"Bullshit." I responded immediately. "Who's babysitting my daughter?"

I didn't care that my tone had a harsh note to it, I am very protective of my Riley.

"Look to your right." He said simply casually folding his arms across his chest.

I looked at Angela, a mixture of shock and relief coursing through me. "Surprise." She said with quiet amusement.

"You're lucky Cullen. I trust Ang, so you're not in too much trouble." I told him.

"Well that's good." He replied with a small smile. "By the way ladies, lunch is ready.

With that we dished up some chicken and pasta salad for each of us, and went out to my front porch which was open under a tree. The weather was wonderful for early July in western New York. Lunch was spent in comfortable chit chat while we ate.

Once we were done, I helped Edward clean up the dishes, and by that time I was completely and utterly exhausted. Staying up half the night with Riley and doing a heavy choreography session was finally catching up to me. I leaned against the counter and yawned. Unfortunately Edward and Angela noticed.

"I'm going to go for now Isabella, I'll be back in a few hours so you can get ready to go out and have fun tonight." Angela said standing up. "Go take a nap."

"Riley will be waking up soon for food and a clean diaper though." I argued weakly.

"Go Bella, I did a few pediatric rotations. I can take care of her for a while so you can get a nap." Edward replied.

"Okay, if you're sure." I responded.

He nodded, and with that I turned over the baby monitor to his outstrecthed hand, then walked back to my bedroom where I put on my copy of Family Guy; Something, Something, Something Dark Side and fell sound asleep on top of the covers.

* * *

><p>I had no idea how much time had passed, all I knew was that I was comfortable, and Edward was shaking my shoulder trying to wake me up.<p>

"Bella hon, I have someone here who'd like to see her mommy's pretty eyes." He said gently pushing on my shoulder.

I groaned burying my face deeper into my pillow. Edward laughed softly rubbing the same shoulder he'd been shaking.

"Well miss. Riley, I don't think mommy wants to wake up." He said. "I think we need to do something drastic."

All of a sudden, I felt Riely's weight on my lower back, then Edward's long fingers tickling my side. I screeched and tried to wiggle carefully away from him.

"Okay, okay, I'm awake now." I called between breaths.

"That did it Riley!" He told my daughter in a cheerful voice.

I turned my head so I could see them and saw them both smiling at each other. The sight caused a kick in my heart. The sensation familiar, and scary all at the same time. I forced myself to look away and glanced at my phone. I took note there were only 2 hours until the anniversary party for Edward's parents and that I had missed a text from Alice.

"Thanks for taking care of her so I could get a nap." I told him stretching.

"You're very welcome. She's a good little one despite the pain from the ear infection." He replied. "Angela is here so you can do what you need to do in order to get ready. I'm going to take off so I can get a shower and changed."

"Wonderful, thanks Eddward. I'll see you at the party then." I said sitting up.

"See you there." He replied with a smile as he exited my room.

As soon as my bedroom door shut, I grabbed my phone to read Alice's text message.

_2 songs. 1 about or for your ex 1 about your current love life. Can't wait. ~A_

I groaned thinking of the million songs I could sing. I scooted off my bed, grabbed my iPod and locked myself in my en suite bathroom.

* * *

><p>An hour and a half later, I was saying goodbye to my daughter and headed for Ryan's sports car, a BMW Z4 convertible. I loved driving it when I didn't have Riley with me, which wasn't often, so it was stored in the 3 bay garage on the property. I left the top up though, despite how wonderful the weather was so I didn't mess up my hair. It was actually doing what I wanted it to for a change.<p>

I made the twenty minute drive and pulled up to the Crystal Ballroom and greeted Alice who was standing outside with Jasper.

"Ali, you look great! I absolutely love your dress." I greeted. She was wearing a mini-dress that had silver beads at the top half and the skirt beaded with lime green beads. The neckline wwas high with a sheer illusion to it, and when she turned around, there was a cut out exposing her back. She was wearing a pair of strappy high heeled shoes dyed to match the lime green beading perfectly. Jasper was perfectly neutral wearing black dress pants and a white button up shirt, sleeves rolled to the elbows.

"Thanks, so do you! I absolutely adore that dress on you." She replied, motioning for me to spin. I did giving her a full view of my fuschia, one shouldered tunic type dress with gold belt around the waist, paired with black strappy heels with a large satin bow on the backs. "Edward is going to die when he sees you in this."

I just blushed and ducked my head at that last comment. "Jasper, did you bring the music track?" I asked him.

"Yep, we're after Edward who will play right after dessert is finished." He replied.

"So should we warm up together before dinner is through?" I asked him.

"I think that's a good thing to do if we want to get a warm up in." Jasper said.

"Alright, well, why don't we head up. I know there's music and dancing going on up there." Alice said intertwining my arm in hers.

We rode the elavator up to the party. WE got there just as the DJ started playing Here (In Your Arms) by Hellogoodbye. Alice let out a squeak and dragged an unenthusiastic Jasper onto the dance floor to dance. I chuckeled once and headed for the table where Rose and Emmett were sitting, greeting Esme and Carlisle along the way. Rose was wearing a blood red lace tank dress that fell to her mid thigh with ruching on the sides which made the dress very form fitting. I'd look like a clown in that dress, but on Rose, it looked amazing. Emmett was dressed similarly to Jasper except for the fact that he actually wore a blood red tie to match Rosalie's dress. I reached the table and set my gold sequined clutch on the table, greeting Rose and Emmett. We talked for a while, curing which Alice and Jasper stayed out on the dancefloor.

"I'm going to go get something to drink." I said spotting a table with coffee pots and a bunch of sodas on it.

"I'll join you Bella." Rose said standing. "Em would you like something?"

"Nah, I'm good." He replied smiling. Rose shrugged and we took off to the refreshment table.

"Too bad there's only champaigne for alcohol here, and that's only for the toasts." Rose said. "I would kill for a glass of wine right about now."

"I hear ya there Rose. Wonder why there's not really any alcohol?" I replied.

"Don't know. It's strange for my family. Edward was shocked too when he found out." She commented.

"Hmm" was my brilliant response.

"Speaking of the devil, there he is now." Rose said offhandedly.

Almost like a reflex, my eyes snapped to the doorway to look. Once I spotted him, my jaw literally dropped open. He looked awesome wearing dark wash jeans, a black button up, sleeves rolled to his elbows and an ice blue tie. If I ever thought he was attractive before, I was blind. I barely registered Rose's soft chuckle before she left me standing there gaping at her brother. I recovered fairly quickly once Alice grabbed him by the hand and dragged him in the direction of our table. I grabbed a random soda, hoping that it wasn't diet, and headed back in the direction I came. I got back to the table just as Edward was sitting down.

"Well hello, Edward, you clean up nicely." I said in greeting.

He turned to greet me, and I could swear his eyebrows rose upwards a bit. "Hello Isabella." He said stressing my name heavily. " I dan say the same for you." He continued standing and giving the back of my hand a searing kiss.

The DJ chose that moment to start playing Lady Antebellum's Dancing Away With My Heart. I felt my cheeks warm thinking about the lyrics.

"How perfect." Edward said. "Bella, may I have this dance?"

"You may." I replied breathily.

He took my hand, and I felt something similar to an electric shock. He led me to a section of the dance floor that wasn't too far away from our table, then stopped and turned to face me. My right hand was already in his left one, so he just brought his right hand to my waist, pulling me closer to him. Once my nose was just a breath away from his neck, I slid my left hand up his bicep to his shoulder. I felt his sharp intake of breath before he began swaying side by side.

"Why didn't you come back?" He asked quietly in my ear.

"What do you mean?" I asked back.

"In college, why didn't you come back?" He elaborated.

"I did." I replied, tears filling my eyes at the memory.

He pulled back just enough so he could look me in the eye. "You did?"

"Yes, I came back the first Christmas break. I'd come back hoping to see you." I admitted to him blushing.

"I was home then too. How come I didn't see you?" Edward asked me, his green eyes clearly showing his confusion.

"Because Rose informed me that you had a girlfriend, I think her name was Tanya." I said, and he cringed. "So with that I decided to make myself scarce."

"I wish you hadn't." He whispered gently in my ear.

"As if I was going to go out of my way to see you after our argument when you had a new girlfriend. I didn't delude myself into thinking you would drop everything for me." I admitted.

"Is that what you were thinking?" He asked, frowning at me.

"That's exactly what I was thinking at the time." I told him.

"Oh Bella, hindsight may be 20/20, but I would've dumped Tanya for you. Actually, I kind of wish I had anyways, but I've said too much.: He said dropping his forehead on the shoulder that was covered by the one sleeve on my dress.

To say I was shocked would be an understatement. Unfortunately, I didn't have much time to dwall on this new information because Edward was leading me to our table for dinner, his hand on the small of my back. Our friends had already chosen their final seats by the time we got to the table, leaving me between Alice and Edward with Emmett to Edward's right.

Dinner started off with a salad then for the main course was either prime rib with baked potato, or grilled salmon with wild rice. I noticed Alice and Rose were the only ones at our table who'd ordered the salmon because all of the guys and I had all ordered the prime rib. The food and conversation was awesome, even Edward was conversing freely. He even acted like he was having a good time.

"Hey Bella, want to go warm up real quick before dessert comes?" Jasper asked.

"Yeah let's go." I replied standing.

"Where do you want to do this?" I asked him as we stepped into the elevator.

"Let's go to my car, it has decent accoustics." Jasper replied.

"Okay." I said.

"By the way thank you Bella." Jasper said randomly.

"For what Jasper?" I asked in return, confused as to why he'd be thanking me.

"The real Edward from 10 years ago is back. We've all tried pulling him from the remains of who he used to be, but none of us could. I should've seen it sooner, only you could, and you have." Jasper explained.

"Wow. What happened to him Jazz?" I asked.

"It's not my story to tell. If he wants you to know, he'll tell you." He replied.

"He told me on the dance floor that he'd have broken up with Tanya for me, and he shouldn've anyway. I'm pretty sure what you're describing, and what I've seen, this has something to do with her." I commented hoping for some sort of affirmation I guess.

"All I'm going to tell you is to trust your instincts." Jasper said gently, suddenly looking older than his 30 years.

Without giving me any specifics, he'd told me what I wanted to know.


	7. Chapter 7

**Ch. 6 ****EPOV**

Jasper and Bella left our table to warm up before they hit the stage to sing, which left me at our table alone with my sister, Emmett, and Alice. I checked the time on my phone then slid it back into my pocket. My sister regarded me over her glass of Coke.

"Welcome back Edward." Rosalie said.

"Thanks Rose, feels good to feel like myself again." I replied.

Rose and Alice both placed their hands on one of mine on the table and gave it a gentle, comforting squeeze. Instantly I regretted shutting out my family in my pain, namely Rose, Emmett, and Jasper. Suddenly someone cleared their throat behind me, shattering my moment at the table. Rose and Alice both removed their hands at the interruption from mine. I turned in my seat to see my father standing behind me.

"Hey dad." I said politely taking a sip of my coffee to prevent the words from sticking in my throat.

"Edward, may have a word with you please? In private?" He asked stiffly.

_Ugh. This can't be good._ I thought as I took another sip of my coffee then stood. Carlisle jerked his head towards the doors leading to the hallway and led me in that direction. I caught sight of my mom who was still sitting at their table. She had her forehead braced in the palm of her hand, almost as if she were embarrassed about something. I fleetingly wondered if she was mortified by whatever Carlisle was up to. I continued to follow him out of the door at the opposite end of the ball room and over to where the entrances to the bathrooms were.

"What do you want dad?" I asked not able to hide my annoyance any longer.

"Do you remember a certain talk I had with you about Isabella at your sisters wedding?" He asked, not even attempting to mask his irritation.

"Yeah, what about it?" I replied crossing my arms across my chest.

"What part of it did you not understand?" He asked.

"With all due respect dad, she's an adult capable of making her own decisions, and she told me after the wedding that she wanted to be my friend. So that's what we are, friends. Nothing more, nothing less dad. Also, she's not your daughter, but I am your son. Some faith in me might be nice." I replied angrily.

"Now you listen to me you little shit, and you listen to everything I am about to say. First off, you've screwed up so much I have no faith left that you can make a good decision to save your life. Second, you have been a damned womanizing man-whore for too long to do a one-eighty in less than 2 weeks, so you're still you, and lastly, I promised Charlie I'd keep you away from her. I gave him my word and you know damn well I will not go back on that." Carlisle said harshly without raising his voice even half an octave.

"Wow dad, thank you for explaining your feelings about me. I don't care what you think about me, or about whatever the fuck you told and/or promised Charlie. I will stay away from her when and/or if she asks me to." I replied.

"Why the hell can't you be more like your sister?" Carlisle asked glaring at me. "Or a even a better question, why the fuck couldn't you even dress up for this event? After all it is mine and your mothers 30th wedding anniversary party."

"At the moment, I could care less what this is to you, but I love mom too much to not play for her. Once everythings done though, I'm done, I'm out. Rose, Emmett, Jasper, Alice, Bella, and I are going out for karaoke. Oh, and not that I owe you an explanation, I had my outfit approved ahead of time by mom." I replied.

"I don't give a shit what you yourself do, but I will be talking to Charlie." Carlisle said.

"What the fuck ever, like I'm so afraid of the old mans club." I replied with a smirk. I snorted at the look on his face then turned and headed for the elevators before he could come up with a reply.

It took less than 2 minutes for the elevator doors to open to reveal Bella and Jasper. She must've read something in my expression because she sent Jasper on into the party and yanked me by the wrist into the elevator with her. She pressed the button for floor level and waited, her hand still around my wrist, gently gripping it which surprised me. We were silent the whole elevator ride, and even the walk out of the side doors to the parking lot. Once the warm air hit us, she stopped and dropped my wrist. I suddenly felt strangely cold despite the warm air without her touch.

"What happened up there?" She asked. "If you don't want to tell me, fine, but is there anything you need?"

All I could do was stare at the amazing woman that is Bella and blink back the tears threatening to fill my eyes. I did not deserve this woman in any way shape or form, but here she was. She was so incredible, and my dad was right. I wasn't shit compared to her.

"I realize how unworthy I am to ask this, but...oh nevermind." I replied my shoulders dropping.

I just needed to feel her arms around me. Needed to hold her like I've always wanted to. I just didn't know how, or if I dare ask her.

"Edward, don't you dare put yourself down." Bella said in a firm voice placing her hand on my shoulder.

All I could do was place my hand over hers before the tears I'd been holding back started streaming down my face. The next thing I registered was that my head was resting on her shoulder, my arms around her waist, her hand gently rubbing the back of my neck in a comforting gesture. I buried my nose into her neck and inhaled her scent; freesia combined with something all Bella. It calmed me, awakened me, and made me desire her all the more.

I started to calm quickly, and just savored the feeling of being in each others arms. There was a certain rightness to it. After another moment, I pulled back, wiping my hands over my face.

"Feel better?" Bell asked gently placing her hand on my bicep.

"Yes, thank you for being there for me." I replied. "Carlisle lit into me."

"What for?" She asked astonished.

"To summarize, I'm a piece of shit who should be more like Rose, and because of that, I should stay away from you." I replied.

"WHAT?" She demanded.

"Bella, I'll admit, over the last year or so, I have done things I'm not proud of, and certainly nothing that makes me worthy to have you in my life in any way, shape, or form." I told her. "But I did tell him that the decision whether I stay in your life or not was up to you and you alone."

"You did?" She asked softly.

"Yeah, why?" I asked her. It was like she couldn't believe I would stand up for her.

"I'm so tired of Charlie telling me who I should or shouldn't hang around with. To have someone to stand up for my independence when a father-like figure tries to do the same, well, it means a lot Edward." She replied. "I'm not used to that. Other than my mother, no one has stood up for me like that before."

"Bella, I'll always stand up for you. No matter what." I told her honestly.

A silent, tender moment passed between us, and I found myself gravitating towards her. The pull between us was so strong, it was almost like the earth's gravity. If I was being honest with myself it was the best thing that could've happened between us. I was leaning in to kiss her, Bella also moving closer to me, our eyes locked, searching. We heard someone behind us, breaking our fragile moment.

"Bella, Jazz sent me down here to fetch you for desert then your performance." Alice said with a wide smile for the both of us.

Bella blinked then smiled softly. "Okay thanks Alice." She replied walking away then through the doors, leaving Alice and I outside alone.

"You sir, are formally discharged from my care." Alice said with a smile.

"What? Why?" I replied

"You don't need me anymore. She's done you more good than I have since all hell broke loose." Alice told me. She stood there smiling at me with a gleam in her brilliant sapphire blue eyes. "I have a good feeling about you two."

"I love you Al." I told her. "Let's hope your good feelings come to fruition."

"You do that! Now, let's go back up so I can have some of that delicious looking chocolate mousse I saw before I had to come after you and Bella." She said linking her arms in mine.

The ride back up wasfilled with light chit chat between me and Alice. When we reached our table again, everyone was engaged in light conversation. Alice gave me a big smile, and Bella winked at me while I sat down. A few minutes later, all the women had hther chocoalate mousse in front of them, and us guys had a slice of the peppermint bark cheesecake. I was nervous, so I didn't taste very much of it unfortunately. Once the desserts were done, Rose stood, followed by Bella and Jasper. Rose motioned for me to stand as well, then beckoned us to follow. We made our way over to the side of the stage for the introduction of our performances.

"Wait here." Rose told us before walking up on stage. She grabbed the microphone and addressed the crowd. "Welcome family, friends, and honored guests. Thank you for joining us to celebrate the 30th wedding anniversary of Carlisle and Esme Cullen, or as they're known to Edward and I, mom and dad. This evening, we have a couple of performances lined up in clebration. To start, I'd like to welcome choldhood friend Isabella Swan-Biers and our cousin Jasper Whitlock to the stage to sing for you their duet version of When You Say You Love Me, originally performed by Josh Groban.

Rosalie stepped back from the mic, and Jasper led Bella up the stairs. Everyone applauded them until the music actually started playing. Rose came to stand by me off stage. I was blown away from moment one. Bella and Jasper harmonized perfectly, their voices blending together beautifully. Bella's singing voice while strong, had a delicate, crystalline quality to it. Jasper's singing voice was strong and sure, sometimes with a hint of vibratto to it in some places. I glanced at my parents, they were holding hands and smiling broadly at each other. The song finished to enthusiastic applause throughout the room which included Rose and me. Bella and Jasper both hugged Rose then me.

"Good luck Edward." Bella whispered in my ear before pulling back and going back to her seat with Jasper.

Rose took the stage again and the room went silent once again. "Our last performance this evening comes at a personal request by my mom. She personally asked Edward if he'd play piano for her. Without further ado, I introduce you to my brother who will be playing mom's all time favorite love song, The Rose."

I took the stage to applause and sat down at the baby grand piano there. For the first time that night, actually now that I think about it, the second time tonight, I felt happy, amazement, contentment. I started playing, letting the music consume me, calm me. I glanced at mom and dad while I played. Mom was smiling widely at me, fingertips pressed to her lips, dad was sitting back in his chair so he was slightly behind her. He had his arm across the back of her chair, but had an unpleasently bored expression on his face. I pictured punching him in the face for a second, and smirked. I then turned my gaze to Bella.

She was smiling at me with an expression of extreme happiness mixed with pride. Suddenly my heart felt as though it were going to explode. I'd always wanted Bella to be proud of me, still did. To see that pride on her face, knowing I was putting it there made me absolutely happy. In fact, it was the happiest I'd felt in a long time. I reveled in the feeling and finished the song. Everyone applauded and Rose joined me on stae and waved me over to the microphone she'd been using.

"Thank you, I ask that you remain standing, and for the guests of honor to join us here on the stage." She said. Once mom and dad had made it up on stage, Rose started talking again. "At this time, I'd like us all to raise our glasses in celebration. Mom, dad, you've come a long way and you've been an inspiration to me and Emmett. May we know the love you have over the last 30 years. Here's to you; we love you, congratulations."

Every guest at their seats toasted and then appluaded. Mom kissed Rose and I on the cheek; dad hugged my sister but coldly shook my hand. With that Rose and I left the stage and returned to our seats. I had just sat when dad picked up the microphone.

"Esme and I would like to thank you all for sharing this occasion, and celebrating with us. These 30 years have been the best of my life. Esme, I told you on our wedding day that you are the center of my world. That is as true today as it was then. I love you darling wife. Here's to 30 more years and beyond." He said then gave my mom a dramatic kiss on the lips.

We all applauded them as they left the stage. I then turned my attention to the only people at our table.

"Well, I think I'm ready to get out of here." Bella said.

"I think I am too. Ready to get my karaoke on." Alice agreed.

"Well then, what are we still doing here?" Emmett asked with a hearty laugh.

The girls gathered their respective purses and we each stopped to say goodbye to my parents. Dad made sure he gave me a warning glare when he knew no one was paying any attention to see it. I glared at him back in anger. I hated that he thought so lowly of me. It made me feel like I was five years old again.

We finished our goodbyes pretty quickly and piled into the elevator. Jasper and Alice were holding hands, Emmett had his arms around Rose from behind, which left me and Bella. I kind of felt awkward with all the PDA around me, but Bella being Bella simply pulled my hand into hers. I quickly looked from our joined hands to Bella's smiling face still facing forward to Alice who was smiling brightly at me. I figured I'd just go with it because Bella obviously knew what she wanted. Who was I to deny her what I wanted when it mirrored my own desires. We got out of the elevator thirty seconds later and met in a group on the sidewalk.

"So, where are we going Alice?" Bella asked.

"We're going to the Q. Where else would have dancing and karaoke all in one place?" Alice replied.

"Ok, I just want to call Angela and check in on Riley." Bella replied. She turned then and walked about a hundred feet away and pulled her cell phone out of the purse she was carrying.

"We might as well walk and leave our cars here." Emmett piped up.

"Yeah, it'd be stupid to drive 2 blocks." Rose seconded.

"I agree, so when Bella gets off the phone we'll head down." Alice said.

Five minutes later we were at the bar waiting for a bartender so we could order drinks. I pulled my wallet out of my back pocket and looked at Bella who was waiting next to me.

"What are you drinking beautiful?" I asked her watching her blush start coloring her cheeks.

"I'm thinking jack and coke so I can have more than 2 and still be able to drive home." She replied.

"Don't worry about driving I told her. If you get too drunk, I will get you home. I'm a DD tonight." I told her.

"You are?" She asked.

"Yeah, Jasper, Emmett, and I all volunteered so you girls could let go. I'm only having 1 bud light." I replied.

"That's awful wonderful of you guys to sacrifice your evening." She told me with a soft smile. I could've sworn she moved closer to me slightly but I couldn't tell for sure because I was becoming intoxicated by the smell of her perfume that I could all of the sudden smell.

"We'd do anything to keep our girls safe." I remarked.

She blushed and looked away, her hair making a curtain down the side of her face. I turned my attention to the bartender who was openly staring at Bella, not moving.

"What can I get for you pretty lady?" He asked.

"She'll have a Jack and coke, and I'll have a bud light." I told him roughly. I was feeling so protective and jealous all at the same time.

Bella shot me a look but I just smiled liesurely at her. She looked away when our drinks were set on the bar in front of us. I handed the guy the money for our drinks and we headed to the table where Alice, Jasper, Emmett and Rose were already sitting with their drinks.

"Here, fill out these papers with your song choices." She said sliding 2 little pieces of paper towards me, and 2 towards Bella.

I quickly wrote down a song and the artist on each of the papers then folded them in half like everyone else had. I slid them over to Alice who dropped them into her purse then took a pull of my beer. The DJ was playing Mr. Brightside by The Killers which was always a favorite song of mine. I glanced over at Bella who was singing the song excitedly with Rose. Both girls were smiling and having a good time which made me happy.

The song ended and the DJ announced the start of karaoke. A girl named Kate was called up to sing some popular pop song. Unfortunately she spotted me from the stage and started singing "here's my number so call me maybe" very suggestively at me. I cringed leaning a little towards Bella hoping she'd help me. I vaguely heard her giggle and place her hand on my knee under the table. Meanwhile, Alice was shaking the purse she'd put our songs in and was getting ready to pick which one of us was going first.

"Alright, I'm going to go turn this song in. All of you beware, even I don't know who is going first." Alice announced holding up the folded piece of paper she'd just pulled out of her purse.

She walked up to the guy running the karaoke session and gave him the paper smiling. He winked at her and she practically danced back to the table. By the time Kate was done with her song, I'd drunk half of my bud light, and Bella's Jack and coke was gone.

"Want another?" I asked her.

"Sure" She responded. "If I have to sing 2 songs tonight, I don't want to be mostly sober."

I laughed and went to the bar. While I was waiting for her drink, the karaoke guy announced the next person to sing. I instantly started to sweat hoping to hell it wasn't me.

"Next up is Jasper singing We The Kings' Don't Speak Liar." He announced.

I let out a breath of relief and watched a red faced Jasper stand up. He started singing when the bartender gave me the Jack and coke. I returned to the table and slid Bella's drink in front of her. She smiled at me gratefully and took a generous sip. I focused on Jasper who was finishing his song. He was good, and apparently the rest of the people here thought so too because he was applauded heartily.

Jasper came back to the table and kissed Alice on the cheek. She smiled at him brightly and turned her attention to karaoke guy to find out who was going next. She didn't have to wait long before the microphone was back in his hand.

"Next up we have Alice singing Cascada's Every Time We Touch." He said.

Alice squeaked and bounced up to the stage to sing. She was as bad at singing as Jasper was good. Bella and I were laughing and joking about when Alice would be done. Thankfully the song wasn't horribly long, and Alice was dancing her way back to her seat while someone else was mutilating Journey's Don't Stop Believing. The whole time I could see Kate with a couple of her friends pointing at me out of my peripheral vision. I cringed when I saw her set her drink on the bar and head in my direction.

"Hey, my name is Kate. What's yours handsome?" She asked trying to sound seductive. I noticed Rose and Bella had heard her and turned in her direction. Alice was too busy shaking her purse again ready to make her next selection.

"Edward." I replied in a monotone voice.

"What an old fashioned name, I bet you're a gentleman. Me and my friends are hanging out celebrating the fact that I just broke up with my ex for the last time. Want to join us?" She asked.

"Nah, I'm good here." I replied.

"Actually he can't, he's here with his girlfriend for their anniversary." I heard Rose say and I nearly choked.

"Wait, what?" Kate asked her eyes nearly bugging out of her head.

"Yeah, this is my girlfriend of 2 years, Bella." I told playing into Rosalie's "save Edward" tactic.

Kate smiled defeatedly at Bella who was smiling widely at her.

"Oh, well, then have a good evening." Kate said backing up and going off to her friends at the bar.

We all laughed, and Bella patted me on the back.

"Sorry for putting you on the spot Bella." I said looking at her only.

"It's ok Edward, I understand." She replied. I heard a defeated sadness in her tone and wondered what caused it.

Any further conversation was cut off by karaoke guy again. "Next up we have Edward singing Red Jumpsuit Apparatus' Choke."

I dropped my head and stood up. Why oh why did it have to be my turn? Everyone at our table was applauding wildly already. Emmett even cat called while I headed to the stage. I flipped him off and heard his laugh at my antics.

I took a deep breath and listened to the guitar opening. I looked to Bella and Rose then started singing. The lyrics flowed out of me, and I felt so much better. This was almost better than any kind of therapy. I thought about Tanya and all my anger and hate poured into the song.

I almost completely doubled over singing the bridge, including the screamo part. I closed my eyes as I sung the chorus and bridge for the last time. The song was quickly coming to an end, and I didn't dread it. I felt entirely that much better after letting the people I cared about most in on my innermost feelings towards Tanya and the pain she caused me.

The song ended and I put the microphone back into it's stand and jumped off the stage to wild applause. I walked back to our table where the girls were all standing, applauding. I went straight to Bella who hugged me tightly. It surprised me, sure, but in a good way, in a way I never wanted it to end. Unfortunately, we live in reality, which I was reminded of when she pulled away to sit down. I sat beside her in my seat and took a swig of my beer.

"That was awesome dude!" Karaoke guy said. "Up next we have Rosalie singing Christina Perri's A Thousand Years."

We all clapped while Rosalie stood up and got up on the stage. She looked like she belonged there. She was very confident, and comfortable in her skin. So much that she did like the attention she got, but she wasn't snobbish about it. I figure that's what Emmett noticed first and why he was so attracted to her. That and her blonde hair, blue eyes, and what some people consider to be perfect curves. The combination would be most guys' dream girl, but not mine.

Mine was quiet, and mostly shy until she's comfortable. Kind of klutzy at times, but manages to catch herself fairly gracefully. A brunette with stunning brown eyes who could dance and make it look so effortless. Yes, I am describing Bella as my dream girl in my head but it's true. She wasn't often looked over, but all she seemed to see was me. It gave me hope more times than I could count honestly. I had always truly loved her, but tonight I was going to do something about it. I hoped she would know the second song I'd picked was for her, the one we had to pick to describe our love life now.

Rosalie finished her song to applause and many cat calls. She left the stage to numerous guys basically eye fucking her as she walked, which caused Emmett to glare at most of the guys around us. She got to the table and was met with a sound kiss from Emmett which was the universal symbol to all guys that the girl was taken. We sat and karaoke dude was back on the microphone.

"Wow that was beautiful darling!" He said enthusiastically. "Next up we have Emmett singing Green Day's Boulevard of Broken Dreams."

Emmett grinned and pretty much ran to the stage to sing he was so excited. He couldn't really sing well, but he wasn't as bad as the dude who destroyed Journey.

In the middle of Emmett's song, I felt Bella nudge my arm. I looked over at her and she motioned me to lean my head down. I moved so I could hear whatever she had to say.

"What's up?" I asked.

"I need another Jack and coke." She said pressing some money into my hand.

"Not a problem Bells, but keep your money. It's no good here." I replied with a smirk.

She lightly smacked my arm with the back of her hand but smiled good naturedly at me. I made my way to the bar to get her Jack and coke. Unfortunately I was approached by one of the girls I'd seen hanging out with Kate.

"Hey, can I ask you a question?" She asked me.

"I guess, I'm waiting for my girlfriend's drink." I replied with a shrug.

"Why did you say no to Kate? She's a good girl." She said.

I rolled my eyes at the way she ignored the word girlfriend in my statement. "Um perhaps it has something to do with the fact that I have a girlfriend." I replied.

"Those are disposable. She's not even that pretty." The girl said. "If you don't want to go out with Kate, I'm definitely better in bed. My name's Jessica by the way."

"Excuse me?" I asked apalled. "How many times do I have to tell you girls, I have a girlfriend, and she's not 'disposable' to use your terminology. I'm in love with her, and there's nothing you can say or do that will change that."

I had to take a deep breath to calm down after my rant. Unfortunately I'd spoken the truth, the truth that Bella had no clue about. "Oh, and she's 10 times more beautiful in my eyes than you." I said before walking away.

I figured she was glaring at me while I walked Bella's drink to her. I couldn't care less. Bella was paying more attention to Emmett on stage to notice what was going on at the bar, or so I thought until I got closer. Her eyes belied a sadness that went to her core. I sat down and slid her drink in her direction. She took a considerable sized sip off of it then almost slammed it on the table.

"What's wrong?" I asked her.

"Nothing." She said quietly.

"I don't believe you sweetheart." I replied.

"I saw you and her at the bar talking." She said sadly.

"Bella, she wanted to know why I turned down her friend. I told her I had a girlfriend and that's why. Once I told her that I would not dump my girlfriend for anyone, I left because the bartender had given me your drink." I told her honestly.

"Oh." Was all she said before looking at her lap.

I had some idea why she was reacting like this after my chat with Rosalie the night before, but I had no solid proof. She'd have to confirm or deny that one herself.

"I need some air, do you want to come with me?" I asked her.

"Sure." She replied. She leaned across the table and told Alice where we were going. I guess Emmett had finished and Rose was up on stage already singing. Alice gave Bella a thumbs up and we made our way outside.

"I was starting to feel a little clausterphobic in there." I told her. "Too many people."

"I hear you." She replied. "I'm sorry for the way I reacted."

"It's fine Bella, I probably would have reacted the same." I told her.

"There's a lot to why I reacted that way, some of which will come out tonight for the first time." She said staring off into the distance.

"I take it it's the song you chose about your late husband." I stated.

"Yeah, he was a good man, but he hurt me, and I didn't know how bad things were until after he died." She replied sadly.

"I'm sorry Bella. You should have been treated better." I told her.

"I know, I didn't deserve it, but it happened." She said. "Emmett and Rose will probably rip me a new one for revealing it in public though."

"Don't worry, I'll protect you, and if they do, know it's just an initial reaction that will fade." I replied, bumping her shoulder with mine.

She gave me a slight smile before we were interrupted by Emmett. "Yo homies, Bella's up." He said loudly.

Bella jumped up in surprise and followed Emmett in the door, rushing for the stage. She leaned into karaoke dude and said something to him, and he responded. She nodded and grabbed the microphone from its stand. I resumed my seat and sat back. Just as the music started, Rose and Alice winked at me. Hopefully that meant something good.

She sang as beautifully, but with more power to her voice about giving your heart a break. I wondered what she was getting at, and made me determined to find out if she was singing for me or what. When she was done, she rushed to her seat while all the men applauded and cat called, loudly.

We watched Jasper then Alice go again, and then someone else who wasn't actually that bad to listen to while they sang Don McLean's American Pie. It was one of my more favorite songs and sang along with the guy. I was totally unprepared when karaoke guy called my name. I knew which song I was singing now, it was the one I picked out that accurately described my feelings for Bella.

I picked up the microphone and decided to make sure Bella knew who the song is for. "This song I dedicate to my best friend, a very special girl near and dear to my heart. You know who you are, this is for you." I said before the music started.

I poured all of my feelings for Bella into Green River Ordinances song Heart of Me. It said everything that I wanted to say to her. How I felt about her, how much I wanted her, needed her. How much she'd taken over my heart, and soul, and how I would chase her, and her shadow if I had to. I expressed the feelings I should have 10 years ago at least, the feelings I was too afraid of at the time. When all my mom cared about were appearances. Luckily she'd changed her tune after Tanya, but the damage had been done unfortunately.

The song ended and there were wild applause throught the entire bar. I figured I didn't butcher it hearing the response. I looked towards our table and saw Bella on her feet, clapping and cheering with tears in her eyes. I didn't register anything but the sight of her cheering for me until I was right in front of her. She threw herself into my arms and hugged me as tight as she could.

"We really need to talk later." She whispered in my ear.

"Okay." I whispered back.

I pulled away as they announced Bella was the last person from our group to perform. I watched her face go white as a ghost. I squeezed her hand letting her know she had my support as she walked up to the stage. I caught Emmett and Rose's faces to see if the song title had hit them yet, and it had. Rose had her hand to her mouth, her jaw hanging open, and Emmett looked equally sad and pissed, although I had a pretty good his anger was not directed at her in any way. Alice was looking at Bella, a sympathetic smile on her face, and Jasper was holding her hand. I sat forward and caught her eye so she knew she had my support before she started singing Rihanna's Take a Bow.

**A/n: Happy birthday to me, I got this posted! Yay! I would love to have a real life Edward sing to me, wouldn't you? Hope you enjoyed. See you next chapter in BPOV!**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/n: Sorry for the mix up with chapter 7, it says 6 at the beginning of last chapter, and that was my fault because I had the chapters labeled wrong in my notebook. Ugh, that drives me nuts, but this is officially chapter 8 so. Let's see what our characters are up to.**

**Again, I don't own Twilight or it's characters, I just like to play with them like my own personal Barbie's.**

**BPOV**

I finished singing and made my way back to where we'd been sitting, but it was deathly quiet. Alice was giving me a sympathetic smile, Jasper was studying the label on his empty beer bottle, Edward was giving me the same sympathetic look as Alice, and it looked like Rose and Emmett were having a silent conversation and didn't notice my approach. I made my way to my seat and downed my Jack and coke in one long drink. I felt Edward's hand on my knee, and I looked into his handsome face. I knew I owed everyone at this table an explanation, but I sure as hell didn't feel like giving it tonight.

I got up and made my way to the bar to get another drink when Alice materialized at my side. I figured she was here to lecture me about letting that loose in public when I hadn't even told Rose and Emmett. It made me feel like a shitty person, and that made me want to drink myself under the table that much faster so I added 3 tequilla shots to my order.

"How are you doing Bells?" She asked quietly.

"Honestly, I just want to get drunk." I told her.

"You know Rose and Emmett do need an explanation at some point don't you?" She asked gently.

"I do, but I'll be damned if it's going to be tonight." I replied.

My drink and shots were set in front of me, and I paid for them before licking my hand. I saw Alice's disappointed look out of the corner of my eye. I knew she didn't understand, but I just needed to forget. I lifted the first shot to down it when Edward replaced Alice next to me. I glanced at him as I downed the shot, then bit into one of the 3 slices of lime in front of me.

"You okay?" He asked.

"Getting better." I replied nodding towards the drinks in front of me.

"Ah yes, drowning yourself in alcohol. I did that too you know. Enjoy it while you can." He said sadly.

I licked my hand, downed the second shot, then bit into the second slice of lime. By then I was feeling a slight buzzing feeling in my extremities. This was what I was after. The awesomeness that came with drinking your sorrows away. I hummed and downed the third shot, then chugged my Jack and coke. By this point, I was struggling just to stand still. The room was spinning and wouldn't stop.

"Well, I'm pretty sure I know how she's feeling." Emmett said from somewhere behind me.

"Yeah, she's trying to drown herself in alcohol. I know the feeling." Edward replied, still beside me.

"I wish she would have told me." Emmett said quietly.

"I know, I sort of suspected this after talking with Rose, but I guess she confirmed it all for us tonight." Edward replied.

"Yeah, I hear you Edward. We all did." Emmett said with a sigh. "Bells, how are ya?" There was a strained lightness to his voice.

"I feeel goood." I replied elongating my words. I hiccuped so loud, but the jerk on my body had me almost falling out of my seat. Luckily Edward was close enough to catch me before I hit the floor.

"Yeah, I think I should get her home." Edward said holding me close to his side.

"Yeah, I think that's a good idea. Get her home safe, and we'll talk to you both tomorrow." Rose said from somewhere. Unfortunately I was disoriented enough not to know where everyone was situated around me. I could just hear people and what they were saying.

"Good night sis, Emmett, Alice, Jas." Edward said.

"Goodnight." They all replied at the same time.

Edward had his arm around my waist supporting most of my weight with one arm. I felt heavy and very light all at the same time, like despite how heavy I was, my feet still weren't touching the ground. Everything was spinning, and I knew it was just because of the alcohol currently flowing through my system. I just made sure to concentrate on my walking despite the arm wrapped firmly around my waist.

"I'm sorry Edward." I slurred out.

"It's okay Bella. I've got you. Don't worry about anything tonight, we'll sort everything out tomorrow, I promise." He replied.

"You're such a good guy." I told him.

He snorted like I'd told him a joke, the movement kind of jarring me to the side. He laughed and pulled me back to his side before he kept walking. "You say that now Bella. Boy could my family tell you different." He replied sadly.

"Edward, I don't care what your family says. Rose doesn't put you down or say any differently. In fact she's been trying to talk you up to me." I told him seconds before I stumbled on a crack in the sidewalk. Edward responded quickly pressing me closer to him so I didn't fall. "Thanks for catching me."

I didn't hear his response he muttered it so low, but it sounded something like "I'll always catch you Bella." "What was that?" I asked

"Nothing Bells. Lets get you home." He replied.

I sighed and allowed him to guide me into the passenger seat of his car. Once I was in and buckled up, my head fell back on the head rest and I closed my eyes. I could feel the car spinning I was so drunk. I must have fallen asleep because the next time I opened my eyes, I was being carried into my house.

"Okay Edward, I'm awake. I think I can walk. Must check on Riley." I slurred.

"Oh no you don't. I'm going to lay you down, and get you some water and asprin, then you're going to sleep. I'll send Angela home and sleep in the guest room next to Riley's room so I can hear and take care of her if she wakes up."

He was apparently talking the entire time he was walking because he laid me down on my bed to end the current discussion we were having about me walking. He left to go get me water and asprin, and I wriggled my feet up far enough that I could take my shoes off myself. I dropped them over the side of the bed and propped myself up enough to drink the water and pills Edward would be coming back with. I really wanted to change into my pajammas, but I doubted Edward would want me attempting that by myself. I wondered how Angela would take it if I asked her to help me. Not that wouldn't like Edwards help with that if I was being honest with myself.

He came back with water and pills and handed both to me before sitting on the edge of the bed. I downed the water and swallowed the pills. I had to admit the water tasted good, cleansing my tounge of the aftertaste of not one, but 3 tequilla shots. Once the water was all gone I handed the glass back to Edward. He got up immediately and went to the bathroom, then came back with a full glass of water which he set on my nightstand.

"Edward, do you think you or Ang can help me get into some pajammas. I really don't want to sleep in this dress."

"Yeah, I'll help you since I'm here. Where do you keep your pajamas and what do you want?" He replied.

"Bottom drawer of the dresser, just find a pair of shorts and a t-shirt." I told him.

He rummaged through everything I'd set aside to sleep in until he found my "wild ride" shorts and a Paramore t-shirt that I'd bought at a concert of theirs that Ryan had taken me to for my birthday the year before Riley was born.

"This okay?" He asked holding both up.

"Yeah, that's great." I replied.

"Stand up." He commanded. _Yikes that was hot!_

I stood and he motioned for me to turn around. He kept a hand on my shoulder while I turned so I was facing my bed. "Here, put these on if you don't want me seeing your underwear." He said handing me my shorts.

I took the shorts, and very carefully leaned a little into Edward so I didn't fall over pulling them up my legs. His hands rubbed my arms lightly while I did this, keeping just the barest contact, but still made me quiver inside. "Okay, they're on." I told him quietly, trying to keep the quivering out of my voice. I wasn't quite sure I succeeded though.

"Do you have a bra on or do you need me to step out?" He asked, still barely rubbing up and down my arms while I leaned against his chest.

"I have a strapless bra on. I can get it off once my shirt is on." I told him.

"Okay, I'm just going to unzip your dress Bella, is that all right with you?" He asked gently.

"Yeah, thanks for the warning." I replied sarcastically.

If I thought my internal quivering was bad when he was rubbing up and down my arms, they were nothing compared to the shivers I got just from him unzipping my dress. Unfortunately it sent my mind wandering straight into the gutter where I was picturing this ending in an entirely too pleasurable, but confusing way. I couldn't go through with something like that without talking to Edward about our feelings and our respective pasts, our personal demons. I didn't notice when my dress fell to the floor around my feet, but I noticed my t shirt being waved in front of my face, bringing me to reality. I took it from Edwards hand and hopefully more graceful than I had been, pulled it over my head.

"Thank you for helping me." I whispered.

"It's not a problem Bella. You need some sleep, and so do I. We've got some talking to do tomorrow." He replied. I knew he was right.

"Please make yourself at home, and I hope you enjoy the memory foam mattress on the bed in the guest room." I told him.

"Nice, I will. I may move in." He joked.

I stepped away from him and climbed into my inordinately comfortable bed, pulling the sheet and blanket up around me.

"Aren't you going to be too warm sleeping with jersey knit sheets and what feels like a micro plush blanket over you?" Edward asked, stroking my shoulder over the blanket.

"Nope, I like being warm when I sleep. I'd rather sweat than freeze to death." I told him.

He laughed lightly. "You are definitely an interesting woman Bella. I'm sorry I missed out on the last 10 years of your life. I imagine they were something. I yawned and nodded, noticing that my eye lids were trying to drop without my permission. "Go to sleep Bella. I will see you in the morning. Breakfast is on me."

I was too tired to respond verbally so I just nodded and rolled onto my side, my back towards the door. And that was the last thing I remembered before I fell into a sound sleep.

I had no idea what time it was, all I knew was there was a dull ache in my head, and my mouth was incredibly dry. I opened one eye to see light streaming through the window next to the head board of my bed. I stretched out and rolled over to look at the time. There, on my night stand, next to my iPod dock, was a glass of water. I figured Edward must have left me another glass of water after I went to bed. I smiled, and took note that it was just after 9 in the morning.

The glass of water never tasted so good, I drank it down without stopping. Then I got up and threw on a pair of black leggings, and a large red t shirt that hung off of one shoulder. Throwing my hair up into my usual ponytail, to avoid it being pulled on, I made my way to the kitchen. Nothing could have prepared me more for what I would see; Edward, shirtless, standing at my stove cooking, the sunlight making him look angelic. The scent of coffee then hit me making me wonder if I'd died during the night and landed myself in heaven.

My stomach chose that moment to make its presence known and growled, lowdly. Edward startled just a bit and turned towards where I was standing with a smile. "Well good morning sleepy head. How are you feeling this morning?" He asked.

"Not too bad considering. Just a dull headache, and I'm wildly hungry." I told him.

"Well, then you'll be glad to know breakfast is just about ready." He replied.

"Yes, I am glad to know that. For now, I'll just have a cup of coffee." I said. "Where's Riley?"

"She's asleep in her crib. She woke up around 6:30 this morning, so I got up, got her fed, and medicated, she played for a little bit with the toys that don't make noise, then she started getting whiny, so I laid her down in her crib with a pacifier and she went right to sleep." He replied.

"Wow, that's just... Wow." I said. "The last time she had an ear infection, she was just plain miserable, night and day. I had a really hard time getting her to sleep."

"Well, I must be magic then." He replied.

"Yes, you must be." I laughed. I poured myself a cup of coffee out of the coffee caraffe into my favorite coffee mug with butterflies on it. The taste was amazing, and instantly I felt a little less like a zombie. "This is delicious. I'm instantly feeling better."

"It's my special hangover coffee recipe. I picked it up in college. I had a few too many late nights with early mornings." He told me.

"Uh huh, I couldn't. Rose often called me a party pooper when she would drag me to a party where I wouldn't drink anything and would leave by 9:30 pm." I replied.

"Yeah, sounds like you and my sister. She was always one for a good party." He laughed.

"Yeah she was fun, but parties weren't my thing." I said sitting at the bar in the kitchen instead of the table.

"Dance always was your thing Bella." He commented.

"Now what the hell is that supposed to mean?" I asked nearly slamming my mug on the bar.

"Nothing! I meant that I know you've always wanted to dance, it doesn't surprise me that you didn't party in New York City, because I know for a fact that you wouldn't do anything to jeapordize your dance career." He replied.

I let out the breath I didn't know I was holding. Realizing I was afraid he hadn't really changed, that he still resented my dancing career because it wasn't considered "suitable". "You're right, and you're lucky." I told him, giving my best cross me again and you die look.

"I know, I'm just that good." He replied with a smirk and a wink. It made my insides all fluttery. "By the way, breakfast is ready. We've got cinnamon french toast with real maple syrup, eggs, over easy the way you like them, sausage, and fresh strawberries."

"Holy shit! How many were you planning on feeding?" I asked with a laugh.

"Just you and I. I know I'm hungry, and I figure you gotta be starving. You'll feel better, I promise. It's another one of those things I learned in college." He replied.

"How did you manage pre-med and med school and still manage to learn about partying, getting drunk, and hangover cures?" I asked, tilting my head to the right.

"Very carefully." He said setting a plate with a slice of french toast, 2 eggs, and 2 sausage patties in front of me.

I watched him in silence while he dished himself up a plate then poured himself a cup of his extraordinary coffee. He set his plate and my Doctor Who mug in front of the place next to mine, then turned and grabbed the bowl of cut up strawberries out of the refrigerator and set it between our settings. I couldn't help but feel thankful, and entirely comfortable. I knew there was still a big talk ahead of us though. I felt his hand on my shoulder and I looked up into his eyes. They were deep green, the deepest shade of green, like an emerald, cut flawlessly, the light bringing out the depth in its color. Suddenly I knew when the conversation we needed to have was going to take place.

"We do need to talk Bella." He said so softly he was almost whispering.

"I know." I whispered swallowing. He sat down in the chair next to me, sitting so he was facing me, his hand still on my shoulder.

"I think you know that I have feelings for you Bella. I always have you know." He said.

"No you didn't, not real ones anyway. They were fueled by childhood friendship, the thought of us going our separate ways for college, and your mother at the time." I replied.

"That's the thing Bella, it wasn't, I had feelings for you for a long time before our stupid argument where I told you out of the blue I did, expecting you to compromise your future, for me." He said, running his opposite hand through my hair. "What I told you last night, about breaking up with Tanya had I seen you during Christmas break, that first year of college, I was telling you the truth."

"Why? Why me?" I asked.

"You're really asking me that question?" He laughed humorlessly. "It's the million things that make you, you. You're beautiful, inside and out, you dance, beautifully, I was always instantly a thousand times more attracted to you whenever I saw you dance. I could never possibly tell you what exactly it was that first attracted me to you though. All I know is one day you were just mine and Rose's childhood friend, and then I woke up one morning, and I looked at you in a whole new light. As a girl, as a beautiful girl, as the girl I wanted to be mine."

"Why didn't you ever tell me before our fight? You know I didn't believe you when you told me because of the timing." I told him.

"I don't know. I kept hoping that my actions would tell you without me having to say it. Taking you to prom senior year, our movie sessions at your house when your dad wasn't home, watching you choreograph your piece so you could get into Julliard, everything. I was always hoping for more." He replied looking down at his lap.

"Why are you so broken Edward?" I asked.

"I'm not ready to tell you yet. I'm too ashamed of myself. My dad is right, I don't deserve you. You're a good girl, always have been, and I've been no good since you walked out of my life." He replied.

"Edward, it doesn't matter what you've done in your past, only the future matters now. What do you want? I don't want to hear what your dad wants, what my dad wants, or what anyone else on this planet wants." I said.

"You, Riley." He replied quietly.

"Are you sure? I need you one hundred percent sure, because I know what I want." I told him, straightening my back, almost dreading his answer.

"I've never been more sure of anything in my life." He replied.

With that our conversation was over. I know this because I surprised myself by closing the distance between us and kissed him. Full out kissed him on the mouth.

**A/n: oops, did I leave a cliffhanger? Sorry :) Please forgive me? I want my own personal Edward to take care of me on those rare occasions that I drink too much!**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/n: Hello readers, I'm sorry it's been a while. I took a step back for a while, I just finished A New Start, and now I'm back. I'm focusing on this story until it's done. I have another one that's floating around in my brain, however, I won't start even putting it down on paper until this one is at least half way done which won't be for a while yet. I won't start publishing until this story is done. Anyway, I'm back and here we go!**

**I still don't own Twilight, but I do own my own copies of the books!**

**EPOV**

Bella was kissing me! It took me a minute to register what was happening, but when it did, nothing could have stopped me from kissing her back. It was pure heaven. Her lips were soft against mine, lightly kissing like she wasn't sure what the reaction would be from me. My hand slipped from her shoulder to trace up her neck and into her hair as I pressed my lips more firmly to hers. Heaven.

Before long she pulled away looking directly into my eyes. "Edward, I think it's time to start over." She said as she leaned back slowly.

"I agree Bella, we need a do over." I agreed, nodding.

"First though, I think a meeting with Rose and Emmett is in order today." She said turning her attention to her food.

"I think that'd be a good idea. Emmett especially deserves to know about his brother." I said digging into my own breakfast.

"You're right. I wasn't thinking clearly last night when we had to pick our song choices." She commented, sadness coloring her voice.

"It happens Bella, and it's unrealistic to expect yourself to carry the burden of that secret forever." I told her.

"I didn't want Emmett to think badly about his brother Edward. He has the right to remember his brother fondly even if I don't." Bella replied.

"Emmett cares about you too, and you should let him decide how he remembers his brother with all of the pieces of information about him. Trust in Emmett Bells." I said.

"You have a point. He should have the information and make a decision for himself. I've been selfish keeping it from him." Bella replied, her shoulders drooping.

"Your heart was in the right place, and no one can fault you for that." I told her placing my hand back on her shoulder.

"I hope so." She replied, reaching up to place her hand on mine. At that moment, a little cry sounded through the baby monitor that was sitting on the kitchen counter. "That'd be my cue." Bella joked standing up and rushing out of the room.

I smiled as I wiped my mouth then continued eating. Bella and I were going to be starting over together, and that made me insanely happy. I could hear Bella talking to her daughter through the baby monitor, and it was so darn cute the way she would talk to her as if the little one could hear her. Riley was a cute baby, and a real sweetheart. I was lucky to have not only Bella in my life, but that beautiful little girl as well.

"I heard you were a good little bug this morning" I heard Bella coo to Riley through the speaker.

I chuckled softly, taking a sip of my coffee as Riley made noises back to Bella as if she knew what she was saying. It warmed my heart infinitely listening to mother and daughter.

"Are we ready to play?" Bella asked.

Riley made another noise to Bella, and she laughed, then I heard footsteps getting closer to me. I continued to eat my breakfast, smiling a greeting when Bella walked in with Riley on her hip. Bella had dressed her in a short sleeved onsie with pink and purple hearts all over it, paired with a pair of pink colored sweatpants and white socks. Taking her seat once again, she situated Riley on her lap then continued eating.

"Good morning again pretty girl." I said to Riley who was staring at me with her big bright blue eyes.

"She's pretty calm for her when she has an ear infection. Much less a double ear infection." Bella commented with a small smile.

"Well that's a good thing." I replied smiling.

"Yes it is. Hopefully it goes away before our appointment with Doctor Gerandy in two weeks." She told me.

"Why's that?" I asked drinking what was left of my coffee.

"Miss Riley's hearing aids are in, and we'll be going up to Rochester to get them." Bella replied finishing off what was left of her breakfast.

"Ah, yeah, you'll definitely want the ear infection cleared up by then." I commented. "If you want I can check her ears again today."

"That would be wonderful, but will there be much improvement after only one day of being on the antibiotics?" Bella asked tilting her head slightly to the side.

"Not much of a difference, but if it will make you feel better I will." I told her gently.

"If there's not going to be enough of a difference, why put her through it you know? I think it's time to clean up from breakfast, then have some down time." She said standing, Riley on her hip, and her plate in the other hand.

"I agree with that plan. Should we text Rose and Emmett and invite them over for dinner, and we can talk with them then?" I asked, standing with my plate in one hand and my empty coffee cup in the other.

"That sounds like a good idea. I'll cook tonight, since you've been cooking for me since yesterday." Bella said leaning against the counter.

"Fine, if you insist, but go spend some quality time with Riley, I'll get the dishes." I told her.

"If you insist." She replied sarcastically, grinning at her daughter who was smiling back at her.

"I do insist." I said smirking.

With that she left me in the kitchen alone with the dirty breakfast dishes and my thoughts. For once my thoughts weren't dark and self-deprecating, but thankful for the blessing of a second chance to make things right. I could hear Bella and Riley playing with noisy toys from where I was, and it made me smile so wide my facial muscles were aching. I dried my hands on a towel and pulled my phone out of my jeans pocket to text Rose and Emmett.

_Hey guys, dinner tonight at Bella's? ~E_

I slid my phone back into my pocket and continued washing the dishes. It was less than 2 minutes later that my phone pinged at me alerting my brain to the fact that I had received a text message.

_Sounds good to us. We really need to talk about last night. ~R_

_I agree Rose, and she knows that. This is why we're doing dinner is so that you guys can talk. ~E_

_I think that's a good idea. Em is really struggling with this one. ~R_

_I understand that. Bella's feeling guilty. ~E_

I sighed sliding my phone back into my pocket for the final time. There was no response from Rose, and Emmett never texted me, so I figured the conversation had been benched until later. I finished the dishes, leaving them out to air dry on a towel, and made my way to the living room. Bella was laying on the floor next to a play mat that Riley was laying on, playing with the toys dangling over her head and giggling.

"She seems to be having fun." I commented.

"She does. I'm glad to see her so happy. At least the antibiotics have reanimated her somewhat. She's normally more active than this." Bella said with a smile.

"Really?" I asked.

"Yeah, the play mat is not a regular toy, usually she plays with it when she's not feeling well enough to be tooling around here on her hands and knees." Bella replied with a laugh.

I laughed lightly. "Poor mommy."

She stuck her tongue out at me and smiled at her daughter. "I wouldn't have it any other way. When she doesn't have a double ear infection she's a happy and healthy baby, and that's all I could ever ask for."

"I'm glad to hear that Bells." I told her from the spot I had taken up on the floor on the other side of Riley's play mat. "Riley, do you keep momma busy?"

Riley's head rolled so that she was looking at me, and she flashed me a smile that showed off her bottom two teeth. "You're such a big girl, look at those two pretty teeth you have."

"You realize we probably look crazy to her because we talk to her even though she can't hear us." Bella commented, her chin now resting on her folded arms.

"Actually maybe not as crazy as you think. She can still see which means her language access right now is visual. She's seeing us talk, she's witnessing conversation, and that will give her some information as to how language works." I told Bella.

"That makes sense I suppose. I still feel like an idiot sometimes when I talk to her because I know she can't hear me. I just wish she could hear me say 'I love you'." Bella said sadly.

"She knows you love her Bells. You take care of her, you hug her, and hold her, you comfort her when she cries, and nurse her when she's sick. That shows her how much you love her, the words are just words, your actions show more than words could ever express." I told her reaching out and rubbing her arm.

"I appreciate that Edward, and deep down I know you're right, it's just hard to wrap my head around you know?" Bella asked.

"I get that. It's going to be hard for us to wrap our head around it because we are able to hear. But how often do we as hearing people find the words 'I love you' to be lacking when the actions of the person saying it aren't adding up?" I replied.

"You're right Edward. I guess I'm just a selfish person." Bella said, tears welling up in her dark brown eyes.

"No you're not, you're a parent. I've seen a lot of patients since I've been out of med school. Your reaction is normal, and you're human. Cut yourself some slack. Her being deaf is not your fault." I replied gently, sliding my way slowly over to where she was laying on the floor crying. I gently started rubbing her back as she cried without moving her gaze away from Riley.

"I'm a selfish person Edward. I worry about the fact that my daughter can't hear me tell her 'I love you', and whether she knows I love her or not. I didn't tell Emmett about his brother because I thought it would be better for him to remember Ryan as a good guy and a hero. I let you go because I thought you'd be better off with your girlfriend way back when. See? Selfish!" Bella cried.

"Your heart was and is in the right place. You're human and we all make mistakes. Yes, you should have told Emmett about his brother. Letting me go, while a mistake at the time, none of us knew it was going to be that big of a mistake at the time. Riley, your reaction is normal, completely justifiable. You can't beat yourself up over something that's not your fault." I told her feeling my own tears build. I felt terrible that Bella was feeling this way, and it seemed like this had been building up for a while.

"Bella, how long have you been feeling this way?" I asked.

"A long time Edward." Bella replied, her voice strained by crying.

"It's time to let it go Bella. You can't live your life like this." I told her, still rubbing gentle circles on her back.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/n: I'm overwhelmed by the positive responses I've gotten to this story since I've picked it back up! Y'all are wonderful! As always, I don't own Twilight, but I do own a shirt that has Edward on it!**

**BPOV**

Edward and I laid on the floor and played with Riley for a couple of hours before she started getting fussy for lunch. Around noon, we picked up Riley and the play mat, and headed for the kitchen for some lunch. I strapped Riley into her high chair, and mixed up her formula, and poured some in her infant first stage cereal then mixed the two together. While I did all of this, Edward grilled us a couple of tuna melts using my sharp cheddar cheese slices.

While Edward and I ate at the pub style table in the kitchen, I fed Riley her cereal mixture. She giggled and smiled, and more of her cereal ended up on her face, bib, and hands than in her mouth. Laughing, I continually mopped her up with a wet washcloth I always kept on hand during feeding time. Edward talked with Riley as much as I did, and giggled when she did. It was if we were a real family, and I liked it.

After lunch, I took Riley into the nursery, and rocked her to sleep. She always liked a long nap after eating, just like her mommy. It didn't take more than 5 minutes before Riley was sound asleep like a log. Laying her in her crib, I turned on the base for the baby monitor, and exited the nursery, pulling the door most of the way closed behind me. I found Edward in the living room, reclining in one of the recliners.

"You could have turned on the television if you wanted." I said patting him on the head.

"It's okay, I wanted to wait for you. Did you want to watch a movie or something?" He asked snagging the hand that had been patting him on the head and holding it gently.

"Sure, Riley's down for a long nap. We've got time to watch a movie, and get ready for dinner." I replied moving around the recliner to lay out on the couch.

"Sounds like a plan. What's for dinner by the way?" He asked from his place on the recliner.

"It's a surprise." I said with a laugh. I turned the television on, and switched the input from the cable box to the Roku. I then logged into Netflix, and started scrolling through their movie and television show selections. "Anything look good?" I asked him.

"Whatever you want to watch Bells is fine with me." He replied smiling over at me.

"So you wouldn't whine if I put on something like Safe Haven?" I asked grinning from ear to ear.

"You're going to make me regret saying that you can choose anything aren't you?" He replied with a groan.

"Nah, I'll take pity on you this time." I said with a smirk, choosing the new Transformers movie.

"Well gee thanks." Edward replied, sarcasm heavily lacing his voice.

I turned my head to wink at him before focusing my attention on the movie. Unfortunately my mind chose to wander despite focusing in on the movie playing out on the television screen. I really wasn't looking forward to having the conversation I needed to have with Rose and Emmett. I was worried about losing them as friends and family, but then again, I wouldn't blame them if they did. I was feeling very guilty about being so selfish as to keep Ryan's and my issues a secret so that no one would think less of my late husband. Edward seemed to be understanding of why I did it, but Rose and Emmett might not be as gracious. Shit, I wasn't even gracious with myself.

I felt the tears building in my eyes again, and I fought to hold them back. I wouldn't cry about this again in front of Edward or he'd write me off. I shifted the direction of my wandering brain to choreography, and coming up with the perfect routine for Angela's Julliard audition. Having choreographed 57 seconds of the opening was not good enough for me. I pictured the music in my head, and I tried picturing motions that would go along with the song. It was obvious to me that there was a significant amount of building in the melody, but the climax of that building had to be positively explosive. When dealing with a rock song with a classical twist, one has to tread carefully to keep the execution of the ballet moves to high integrity. Lines have to be more perfect than normal, spins have to be on point and powerful, every technical detail has to be nearly flawless because judges write off dancers who take risks without the technicality to back it up.

Before I realized I'd gotten lost in my own head, half of the movie was over, and it was time to start the prep work for dinner. With a sigh, I heaved myself off of the couch and went to the kitchen, noting Edward had fallen asleep in the recliner. _Poor guy._ I thought as I passed by. I reached the kitchen and pulled out everything I would need for dinner: chicken breasts, cream of chicken soup, rotel, tortillas, and shredded Mexican blend cheese. After washing my hands I cooked up the chicken, diced it up, shredded the tortillas, and then put the casserole together. Once that was done, I stuffed it in the refrigerator so that an hour before dinner, I could just pop it into the oven.

I went back to my room and sat on the edge of my bed. My phone had remained on my bedside table all morning and so far this afternoon, so I picked it up to see if I'd missed anything. The only thing I missed was a text from Alice wondering how I was doing. I texted her back that I was doing okay, and that I didn't wake up with the hangover from hell. Then I texted Rose, hoping she was more likely to respond to me nicely.

_What time are you guys coming over for dinner? ~B_

After a couple of minutes, R2D2 alerted me to a new text.

_Whenever. Just text us what time dinner will be done and we'll be there. ~R_

Short, sweet, and to the point. Well there's the proof that they're not too happy with me.

_I'll put the casserole in the oven at 4, it takes an hour to cook in the oven. ~B_

I texted back, then dropped my head into my hands. This was not going to be easy to get through, and I hoped that I hadn't totally screwed things up with my childhood best friend and brother-in-law.

_Okay, we'll be there at 4:30 then. Do you want me to bring anything? ~R_

I sighed as I typed out my response.

_No, I got it all covered. ~B_

_Okay, see you then. ~R_

After 5 minutes and no R2D2 sounds made by my phone, I changed into my dance gear and headed out to the studio I had converted the back room to. I turned on the song I'd been trying to choreograph, made sure the volume was low enough it wouldn't wake Edward, and started to dance. Luckily my mind went blank as I got more and more into what I was doing. With every twist, turn, stretch, arch, and drop I became more and more focused until all that was left of the world for me was the floor under my pointe shoes, the music, and my movements. All of the drama, stress, and fear floated away on the breeze, and for these moments I was entirely free. This is why I went to school for dance, this is why I refused to give up my career.

I wasn't sure how much time had passed since I came out to the studio, but it scared the shit out of me when I finally noticed Edward leaning against the door jamb smiling at me.

"Holy crap you scared me Edward." I said my hand coming up to rest on my chest.

"I noticed." He replied with a laugh.

"It's not nice to scare people." I told him sticking my tongue out at him as I pressed pause on the remote for the stereo. "What time is it?"

"It is 3:30 in the afternoon, and I wasn't sure what time you were going to be starting dinner." Edward said looking the watch I somehow didn't notice he wore.

"Well shit, it's been about 2 hours. I should go shower off really quick, and it'll be time to put dinner in the oven. Do you mind turning it on to preheat?" I asked fanning myself off while the sweat dripped down my face.

"That's not a problem Bells. What temperature?" Edward asked handing me a hand towel from the shelf in the laundry room.

"Three hundred and fifty degrees please." I responded wiping the sweat from my face and neck before untying the ribbons on my pointe shoes.

"Alright Bells, the oven will be on and waiting for you once you're done with your shower. I'm just going to run home really quick and change my clothes." Edward said kissing me on the top of the head.

"Sounds good. I'll see you back here. Rose said she and Emmett will be here at 4:30 just so you know." I told him standing up to put my pointe shoes on the shelf with the stereo system on it.

"I will make sure I'm back in time to greet them with you." Edward said with a gentle smile.

"Take your time, there's no rush." I replied returning his smile.

"I want to be here with you Bella, of course I'm going to rush." He told me with a wink.

"That was ridiculously cheesy Edward, seriously." I laughed.

"I know, but you love me for it." He replied giving me an innocent look.

"You're such a dork. Go so you can get back here before Emmett eats the entire casserole I made." I told Edward nearly shoving him out the kitchen door.

"Fine, as you wish." Edward replied, giving me a dramatic pose with the back of his hand draped across his forehead, head thrown back.

"Such a drama queen." I quipped kissing him on the cheek.

"Whatever. I'll see you in a bit Bells." He replied with a quick wave before disappearing out the screen door.

I didn't close the kitchen door until I saw his silver Pacifica pass the porch headed down the driveway towards the road. Once he was gone, I took the baby monitor and headed for the shower. I did physically stick my head in Riley's nursery on my way by, and she was sound asleep in her crib, her hands on either side of her little head. I smiled, backed out of her nursery, and moved into my bedroom, shutting the door.

I stripped out of my shorts, leotard, and tights before entering the adjoining bathroom. There I turned on the sound system I had installed in here and put on a mix of all of David Garrett's songs. I then turned on the shower losing myself in the melody of this version of Ode to Joy. Fifteen minutes later, I was completely clean. I wrapped myself in a towel, and went to the closet to figure out what I was going to wear. I decided I didn't want to look like a slob, but I didn't want to dress up too much either. Since the weather was still playing nice, I grabbed my lace, capri length leggings and paired it with a casual summer dress.

By the time I was done dressing, it was time to put the casserole in the oven. I exited my room with the baby monitor, and went to the kitchen where I pulled out the casserole dish from my refrigerator, and popped it into the preheated oven. Once it was in the oven, and the timer was set for an hour, I went back to my bathroom where I blow dried, and brushed out my hair, then put a light layer of makeup on. Finally happy with the way I looked, I checked on Riley once again, and went back out to the kitchen. I started cutting up fruit for a fruit salad while I waited almost anxiously for everyone to arrive.

As I was putting the finishing touches on my fruit salad with yogurt dip topping, Edward was pulling back into my driveway, with 10 minutes before Rose and Emmett would be over. I watched him walk over to the house from the kitchen door taking in the handsomeness that was Edward. He'd changed his jeans for khaki shorts, and instead of his button down and tie from the night before, he opted for a black and white striped, short sleeved polo shirt that hugged his bicep muscles beautifully.

"Hello there, you look handsome." I said yanking the kitchen door open just as he'd stepped onto my enclosed porch.

"Hey beautiful." He replied looking me up and down. "You ready for this?"

"Not really, but it needs to happen so I can't back out." I replied lowering my eyes.

"I'll be by your side the entire time." Edward said tilting my head so I was looking him in the face.

"I appreciate it Edward. More than you'll ever know." I told him honestly.

At that moment, my daughter chose to wake up, her little voice blaring from the monitor on the counter behind me.

"It's that time again." I said sarcastically, but with a smile on my face.

"You go take care of her, and if the McCarty's show up while you're taking care of little miss, I'll take care of them." He told me.

"Thanks Edward, I appreciate that." I replied before running down the hall to take care of Riley. I was kind of hoping she'd help me stall having to face Emmett and Rose.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/n: Hi everybody! I'm back! Wonder how things with the McCarty's are going to go down? Hold on to your hats readers! As always, I do not own Twilight or its characters, but I do own the TV I use to watch the movies!**

**EPOV**

I turned off the baby monitor so that Bella could take care of Riley without anyone listening in. About the time I found a hiding spot for it, I saw Rose and Emmett walking across the driveway towards the house. Rose was wearing jean shorts and a jeweled black halter top, and Emmett was wearing jeans and a black polo shirt. They were holding hands, and it made me smile a little. I was secretly glad my sister had found someone who loved her so much, and made her his life like Emmett had. I watched as they opened the porch door and removed their shoes before entering through the kitchen.

"Hey guys." I said moving to greet them.

"I didn't know you were going to be here big brother." Rose said quirking an eyebrow at me.

"I'm just here for moral support." I replied holding my hands up in the surrender position.

"We're not going to eat her alive." Emmett said rolling his eyes. Yep, my sister was definitely rubbing off on him just as much as he was rubbing off on her.

"I figured that, you knew that, but this is Bella we're talking about. She thinks you hate her." I said leaning back against the peninsula counter.

"Edward, we don't hate her. We're confused as all get out, don't get me wrong, but we just want to be able to understand." Rose said.

"Well, just tell her that then and I'm sure everything will be fine." I replied. "Drinks?"

"What's she got for liquor?" Emmett asked moving further into Bella's kitchen.

"I don't know. I don't know where she would keep it." I replied honestly.

"I know where it is." Rose said rolling her eyes and stalking out of the kitchen towards Bella's studio. Em and I followed and nearly ran into her when she stopped in the laundry room instead of continuing on. Behind Bella's studio door was a cabinet, and when Rose opened it up, my jaw dropped. Bella had a small liquor store packed into the cabinet. Pretty much whatever kind of liquor you would want was there.

"Most of these bottles were Ryan's." Rose explained looking directly at me. "He liked his cocktails. He wasn't a drunk, but he did like to drink."

"He wasn't abusive was he?" I asked, my voice nearly shaking with nerves.

"Physically, not that I'm aware of. His abuse was more emotional than anything. Then again, I don't think I got the whole story, I'm just working off of bits and pieces of what Bella would tell me." Rose said sadly.

"How do you mean Rosie?" Asked Emmett who had been studying the liquor bottles while Rose and I had been discussing his deceased brother.

"We'll talk about it with Bella hon." Rose said gently.

"What is it with people keeping secrets from me about my brother?" Asked Emmett throwing his hands in the air.

"Do you really think they were going to speak ill to you of your brother while he was alive? And then right after he was shipped home in a pine wood box? That would have been mean Emmett. I think Bella was trying to spare your feelings, and your relationship with your family." I replied. "It's just a guess because to be honest, I don't know the situation all that well yet, but it's what I would have done Em."

"I want answers!" Emmett exclaimed, running his hands through his hair.

"I'm ready to answer your questions Emmett." Bella's quiet voice answered from behind us.

I whipped around surprised, to see her standing in the doorway linking the laundry room with the kitchen, holding Riley who was now wearing a pale pink sleeveless jumper and a pair of capri length leggings. Every one silently followed Bella and Riley to the kitchen where I helped Bella strap Riley into her high chair. Once that was done, we sat around Bella's kitchen table where Emmett proceeded to pour himself two fingers of scotch.

After drinking his drink in one go, he wiped his mouth and looked directly at Bella with a hard look. "I want to know about my brother Bella. I think I have the right to know who he was." Emmett told her.

"You do, however, I need to tell you why I never said anything before now. To me, you have and had the right as Ryan's brother to remember him in a positive way. He's your brother, and despite the fact that he died, he will always be your brother. I didn't want to burden you with my bad memories, and if that makes me a bad person for wanting you to remember Ryan fondly, then whatever." Bella started. "If you want to end this conversation at that and not spoil your memories, then I'm fine with that, but if you really want my side of the story, I'll tell you."

"Bella, I care about you too. You're not only my sister-in-law, you're my friend. If your marriage wasn't a happy one, you could have confided in me." Emmett replied, his hands folded on the table top.

"That wouldn't have been fair Emmett. Not to you, and not to Ryan. You were family. I would never have done anything to ruin your relationship with your family." Bella told him gently.

"Shouldn't I have had a say in that though?" Emmett asked leaning back in his chair, folding his beefy arms over his equally beefy chest. The man was a bear.

"Maybe, but do you really want to hear that your brother hurt me? He might not have hurt me physically, but emotionally, he destroyed me to the point where all I wanted to do was work because that's the only thing I could lose myself in." Bella replied, her eyes flashing.

"Guys, we really aren't getting anywhere. Bella's explained why she didn't tell you Emmett, now it's up to you if you really want her to tell you about her and Ryan's marriage, or not." I interjected placing my hands gently on the table top.

"Edward's right guys, we're talking in circles avoiding the choice. I for one would like to know the whole story, but Emmett, if you don't want to know, now's the time to back out." Rose said looking between Bella and Emmett.

I felt like I'd been watching a volleyball tournament, my head turning towards the person talking then back again. Bella was now staring at Emmett and he was staring back at her. The timer of course chose that moment to go off breaking the staring contest brewing. Bella got up and turned the timer off before removing a wonderful smelling casserole from the oven. She set the casserole on the stovetop, turned off the oven, and started dishing up the food. I got up from the table to help her, taking her fruit salad from the refrigerator, and dished it up into the fancy old-fashioned dessert bowls Bella had inherited from her great-grandmother. By the time I was done, Bella had everyone's plates on the table, and was back at the counter mixing formula and baby cereal together.

I carried the dessert bowls and put one at each place setting, grabbed a Coke from the refrigerator before taking my seat again. We all watched as Bella finished making up Riley's dinner, put a bib on her little miss, and then poured a glass of lemonade for herself. Once Bella was sitting back in her chair, we all dug into our food.

Dinner was silent, except for Riley's noises of content and happiness whenever Bella would give her a spoonful of her baby food. Even Emmett who usually made noises while he ate was quieter than normal. It was a tense silence, and I was beginning to feel like I should take Riley and escape the room. Unfortunately I was so caught up on the atmosphere of the room, that I didn't realize I'd finished my dinner until my fork came back to my mouth with no food on it. Glaring at my fork as though it'd let me down, I picked up my plate and bowl and dropped both in the sink.

I excused myself from the dinner party in the kitchen to go to the bathroom where I pulled out my phone and texted Alice.

_This has got to be the most awkward dinner I've sat through in a long time ~E_

I slipped my phone on silence so that my text tone did not reverberate through the strangely quiet house.

_What's going on? Are they yelling at each other? ~A_

_No. There's no talking. There hasn't been any talking. Everyone is more quiet than usual! ~E_

_Even Emmett's eating sounds? ~A_

_He's even eating quietly. It's disturbing. ~E_

_Need us to come over and break the ice? I only live 5 minutes away. ~A_

_I don't know how much good it'll do. Rose and Em seemed a little surprised I was even here. ~E_

_Why wouldn't you be? It's not like you don't have a crush on her ~A_

_What am I? A teenage girl? A crush? Really Alice? ~E_

_You love me and you know it! And fine if you don't want to call Bella a crush then… ~A_

_Then what Pixie? ~E_

_Annoydward, love it! ~A_

_I'm about to be Pissedward Ali ~E_

_Too bad you'll just have to figure it out on your own ;) ~A_

_You suck. ~E_

With that I put my phone back in my pocket, flushed the toilet, and wandered my way back to the kitchen. Everyone's plates had been gathered and placed in the sink, and Bella was sitting at the table with Rose and Emmett, wringing her hands.

"What'd I miss?" I asked as I came around the table. I picked Riley up from her high chair and sat down with her in my lap.

"Emmett wants to know about my marriage to his brother." Bella said softly.

I looked to Rose and Emmett who were sitting close to each other, holding hands. I reached over and grabbed Bella's hand which I squeezed in a show of silent support.

"There's not a lot to tell guys. For most all of my marriage, even when Ryan was home from a tour, I'd still be left alone at the house. He'd go drinking with his friends, and he'd never invite me, and even stay out until all hours of the night. No matter how many times I'd ask him to come home early, he refused saying he would never leave a bar until it closed." Bella started, her eyes glossing over with a thin layer of unshed tears.

"WHAT?" Roared Emmett, standing, his face red as a tomato. "Bella, please tell me why you stayed with him when he was basically neglecting you?"

"I thought he'd grow up someday Emmett, that's the only answer I can give you." Bella replied, her tears slowly spilling over her eyelids and down her cheek. "So I let it go, and I stopped bringing it up, and tried convincing myself that it didn't matter. I even ignored the time I thought I saw him refer to a girl as 'honey' in a text."

"Please tell me you didn't?" Rose commented, dropping her forehead into the palm of her hand.

"What else was I supposed to do Rose? Leave the guy because I thought I saw something inappropriate?" Bella asked throwing her hands in the air.

I shifted Riley, who was beginning to get wiggly so she didn't fall off of my lap.

"Yes! You should have at the very least called him out on it!" Rose exclaimed

"I'm with Rose on this one Bella, you shouldn't have let my brother get away with it without being called out." Emmett said quietly, his hands clenched in fists.

"I wish I had, but hindsight is 20/20 I suppose. It was not long after that, I found out he'd been cheating on me. He went to a training exercise, and accidentally left his phone under his pillow. I woke up that morning when his text tone went off. I wish I hadn't looked at his phone because the message is still burned in the back of my mind. I read it, and my heart just stopped, and because I'm a damned masochist, I read the entire message thread." Bella started reciting the story, looking at nothing and no one in particular, and squeezing my hand for all it's worth. "When he came home from training, I was sitting on the steps holding his phone and my wedding rings in my hand. He took one look at me and started begging me to let him explain. I tried not to listen to him, I really did, but I was weak. He offered to stay at a friends for a number of nights until I was comfortable having him at home again, but the nightmares were so bad, I ended up letting him stay. We went to one marriage counseling session with the chaplain on base, but it never went anywhere. So, we moved forward and existed until we found out I was pregnant with Riley. The day we found out even, I was a wreck, and he left me alone to go out with friends."

"Please, please, please, for the love of my sanity tell me that's the worst of what my brother did?" Emmett asked, his eyes glistening with unshed tears of his own.

"I wish I could Emmett, I really do. Everything leveled out again after that, Ryan was good for a while, and then he had a friend who he needed to help. I supported the decision to help this friend because I'm a helper. If I hadn't gone to school for dance, I'm pretty sure I'd go for Psychology. Anyhow, I looked the other way while he helped his friend, much against my family's speculation and objections." Bella continued.

"Wait, Renee, Phil, and Charlie knew?" Rose asked, her eyes as wide as saucers.

"Yeah, they were my sounding board, also Renee and Phil were there at the house for a visit when I discovered Ryan was cheating on me from his phone." Bella replied.

"I feel like everyone knew about this but me." Emmett commented lowly.

"No not everyone Emmett. Obviously Rose didn't know, Edward didn't know. Their parents don't know the whole story. It's not just you Emmett, and I won't apologize for trying to shield you from this mess. I will stop here if you want, but there is still some more to this story." Bella told him reaching over to place her free hand over one of Emmett's fists.

"No, I need to hear the rest. I need to hear it Bella, I've gotten this far, I can handle the rest." Emmett said squeezing his eyes shut.

"Emmett, I'm getting to the end here. I let him help his friend, despite the objections, and the voices of my family telling me that I should be suspicious, that I should look into this, and don't trust Ryan. He got the notice that he was shipping out for another tour a month later, and he was shipping out within a week. The night before he shipped out, I decided to do laundry. He was already asleep, it was really late at night, but I couldn't sleep. While I was making sure there wasn't anything in pockets, I came across a hand written love letter to Ryan. In it the woman talked about moving in with him, and how she couldn't wait to see him every day. I lost it that night Emmett. I woke him up, threw the letter at him, and kicked him out of the house. He spent the rest of the night at one of his buddy's bachelor pads. He tried calling the house before he shipped out, but I refused to talk to him. He left me a message begging me to talk to him, to go to marriage counseling with him, and not to give up on him. I deleted the message, and I skipped going to the send-off that afternoon. While he was over in Afghanistan, I started the process to move back here. I quit my job teaching ballet from beginners to advanced dancers, as well as consulting on choreography for prestigious ballet companies. I was ready to execute the move when Ryan's CO was driven to my front door in full uniform to tell me Ryan had been killed. You know the story from there, I played the dutiful, grieving wife, even though inside, I was anything but." Bella finished.

**A/n: There you go readers. Bella and Ryan's entire story. Emmett, Rose, and Edward now know it. Next up, Bella!**


End file.
